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08/31/2006: "I Feel So Much Safer ..."

In a hundred years or so, after the inevitable demise of that which we currently refer to as "the American Way", historians will look back to try and understand the underlying cause of the failure of our empire. On the off-chance that they will use this blog as one of their resource tools, I can save them a lot of effort by identifying the root cause of all of our troubles:

Political Correctness.

We're so terrified that something we say, something we do ... something we think ... might be deemed offensive by some miniscule splinter of society that we can't even hold a simple conversation, much less the significant debates any society needs to have as part of problem solving. There's no question in my mind that some cataclism - or just a better organized society - will arise and crush us while we're all busy apologizing to one another and calling our lawyers on speed dial.

The latest piece of evidence for the jury? The NFL - that bastion of moral leadership - has informed their teams that they can no longer use the song, "Rock and Roll Part 2" (believe me - you know it) as part of touchdown celebrations because the singer, aging English rocker Gary Glitter, has been convicted of child molestation in Vietnam.

"We've communicated to the teams that due to current events we'd like them not to play the song," NFL spokesman Brian McCarthy confirmed yesterday. "The reaction has been overwhelmingly positive. Teams understand the reason for the request."

Unless you're a hardcore British Glam Rock fan, you don't even know who the hell Gary Glitter even is, much less be in a position to possibly be influenced by his conviction. What - I'm supposed to hear the song, think about Gary, and start groping the teenager in the next seat? C'mon ...

Of course, the NFL has no problem with having its fans influenced by players who do drugs, drink and drive, abuse steroids, and God know what else ...