Welcome to the MarlinBlog - unvarnished, unedited and uncensored comments from your host on just about any topic you can imagine. Fishing, sports, celebrity, politics, religion - all those topics they tell you to stay away from in polite conversation. Not here, baby! I make you no promise but this - we may agree, we may disagree, but you'll always get the truth - as I see it ...
Wednesday, February 28th
He Clearly Doesn't Get It
Last season, when the Florida Marlins hired rookie manager Joe Girardi to run the team, one of the concerns was how his lack of experience would impact his performance. After all, his only previous coaching assignment was one year as a bench coach for the Yankees, and he was only a couple of seasons removed from his playing days.
To his credit, he kept a rookie-filled Marlins squad competitive until the last weeks of the season, as the Marlins battled for the wild card spot. The Dodgers ended up with the WC, but the Marlins and Phillies played some tough games coming down the stretch, and ultimately knocked each other out of contention. Despite a season of overachievement, it was clear that Girardi and the front office didn't see eye to eye, and he was let go at the end of the year - even as he collected the NL Manager of the Year Award.
Now we're starting to learn just how out of touch Girardi might have been. Jon Lieber, pitcher for the Phillies, is quoted as saying that his 2006 season was saved by a tip from an unexpected source - Marlins manager Girardi!
Lieber said his season with the Philadelphia Phillies turned around shortly after he was roughed up by the Marlins last July 31, and he credits a phone call from Girardi, a former major league catcher. They played together with the Chicago Cubs from 2000-02.
"He just mentioned that the hitters said everything that was coming in was just very flat," Lieber told the Philadelphia Daily News. "I wasn't on top of the ball like I should have been."
Say what? I have news for Joe - if he's not wearing the same uni you are, you don't help out - especially after you just kicked his ass! Why not tip him off to your signs, while your at it. It's worth noting that Lieber had two more starts against the Fish coming down the stretch - and won both.
It might be a while before Girardi gets another shot at the top spot if this his idea of how the job should be done ...
Let's face it ... if you win an Oscar, you have the entertainment world by the balls - at least for the night. You can go where you want, you can do what you want, you can say what you want, and the little gold guy in your hand will guarantee that no one will say a thing.
We've all heard the stories of Oscars being left in restaurants - or restaurant bathrooms - in the confusion of the moment, so it's always interesting to see how the winners will react. So how does Helen Mirren, best actress Oscar winner - for playing the Queen of England, no less - celebrate her win?
A double-double and champagne! It's your night - you go, girl!
Being a student of the human condition, particularly its stupider elements, I'm a big fan of the Darwin Awards. Periodically, I'll share with you someone I feel is a worthy nominee. Here's the first:
A man who authorities say appeared to be driving while using his laptop computer died Monday when his car crossed into oncoming traffic and collided with a Hummer.
California Highway Patrol officers found the victim's computer still running and plugged into the cigarette lighter of his 1991 Honda Accord.
The 28-year-old victim was a computer tutor in Chico, Calif. The Sutter County coroner's office was withholding his identity until his family could be notified.
"The screen itself shattered from the impact, so we can't be sure if he was working on it or not, but we think from the way it was found that he might have been working," said Sgt. John Pettigrew, a CHP spokesman. "It's a straight road right there, and it doesn't look like he fell asleep or anything else."
And you thought it was tough to pat your head and rub your tummy ...
Anyone who has grown up in Los Angeles knows that gang violence is no laughing matter. Far too many people have seen their lives ended in violence, and their families destroyed by the grief. It's not a new problem, and it's probably not as bad now as it has been in the past, yet it remains one of the biggest challenges facing the leaders of our community.
That said, sometimes it can be the source of humor. Schools in the Los Angeles Unified School District are often scenes of the worst incidents, and new Superintendant David Brewer is making a strong effort to be seen as a hand-on leader in the fight against violence. And Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa - not one to miss a press opportunity - well, if Brewer's going into the community, Tony's gonna tag along.
Thus it was that the two found themselves onboard a bus outside the Santee Educational Complex in South Central yesterday. The area, considered to be one of the toughest areas in town, has been especially tough for bus riding students, who have to navigate a two-block gauntlet from the bus stop to the school. The obvious solution is a bus stop directly behind the school, and it was the "grand opening" of the new stop that brought the community leaders out.
While the crowded Metro bus carrying Brewer, Villaraigosa and a crowd of journalists was stopped at Washington Boulevard and Maple Avenue, an unidentified youth believed to be a Santee student dashed up and scrawled graffiti on a side window.
As word of the incident rippled through the crowd, Villaraigosa asked that the bus be stopped to catch the tagger. Officials soon thought better of the idea, and rather than create a traffic hazard at a busy intersection, pledged to identify and deal with the student today.
Still, the mayor was heard to say that the boy should do "a lot of community service" after being caught.
Of course, some people just don't get it ...
"It's a cry out for help," said Vince Carbino, Santee's principal. He said he will meet with the youth, together with one of the school's social workers, to "help the student and get him on the right track."
I'm thinking a boot to the butt is a good start. While you're at it, kick the principal as well. Cry for help, my ass ...
There's another big storm about to roll into New York - what's this, two or three in the last month? The news this time isn't the storm, though, but rather the reaction to it's impending arrival. You remember the last one, right - the Big Valentine's Day Storm of '07? It wiped out pretty much all movement on the East Coast. No one was hit - or hurt - as hard as as air carrier JetBlue who, though a series of missteps, was left with thousands of passengers stranded in terminals and on tarmacs. I think there might still be a few lost souls wandering aimlessly through their terminal at JFK.
In the wake of the last storm, JetBlue announced its Passenger Bill of Rights, intended to assuage irritated passengers with travel vouchers for future flights. Now, with another storm bearing down and threatening to swamp an overworked logistics staff, JetBlue is taking no chances. They preemptorily cancelled 40% of their flights into JFK for today, and some flights using other East Coast airports as well. Passengers are given the opportunity to rebook later in the week with no penalty.
JetBlue is doubtless feeling the heat, and is desperate to avoid the PR nightmare they faced after the last blizzard. I'm not sure this is the right answer, but I understand their reaction. The cynic in me wonders, though, if this wasn't done simply to avoid the payouts of their new BoR ...
So they'll be handing out the little gold guys Sunday at the Kodak Theater, but c'mon - do we really care? Sure, it's interesting to see if you got your guesses right, but I know the real reason people watch - the hotties in the gowns.
It's the same thing every year around this time. Every woman who's anyone - or hopes to be - will schmooze the designers and claw the other girls to get a chance to wear the most memorable gown. Add a hundred grand worth of diamonds and an itty-bitty purse, and you're ready to go!
What can they possibly hold in those purses anyway? Oh yeah ... that's right!
Anyway, as part of our effort to get you ready for the big night, here's Salma Hayak displaying her ... assets ... on the red carpet at a past ceremony.
Let's be honest - it's been a while since there was a movie I felt was good enough to justify paying what the theaters charge. A lot of it is crap, and frankly I'm amazed that as many pay to see some of that slop as they do.
That said, it's hard to live in Los Angeles and not be in tune with the movie industry. I don't have to actually see the movie to understand which are good and bad, or which performances are worthy of recognition - I get beat over the head by a dozen different media sources covering the industry to the Nth degree.
So, since everyone else is doing it, I feel obligated to provide my picks for this weekend's Academy Awards. Here goes nothing:
- Best Supporting Actor: Eddie Murphy for "Dreamgirls" over Alan Arkin for "Little Miss Sunshine". A bold role for Eddie - who thought he could succeed in a singing role after hearing his "Party All The Time"? He could lose - or gain - votes if Jennifer Hudson takes the supporting actress. You know how the voters love to send messages ...
- Best Supporting Actress: Jennifer Hudson for "Dreamgirls". Take that, Simon Cowell and Beyonce' Knowles ...
- Best Actor: Forest Whitaker for his portrayal of Idi Amin in "The Last King of Scotland". Won't be surprised, though, if it goes to Peter O'Toole for "Venus" - the Academy loves the sentimental favorites.
- Best Actress: Helen Mirren for "The Queen". This is Britain's year, and there's a thin field ... Penelope Cruz???
- Best Director: Marty Scorsese for "Departed". Lord knows he's waited long enough. Clint Eastwood will get some love for "Letters from Iwo Jima"; if he'd found a way to knit it together with "Flags of Our Fathers" he'd have needed a new trophy shelf.
- Best Picture: "Babel", in a tight race over "Departed". Frankly, it was a weak year for films ...
If I have a flaw as a webmaster, it's that I can't resist new software. Sure, I know that you should wait until someone else has shook out all the bugs, but I just can't do it.
When I started the MB last May, one of the primary drivers was a desire to work with blogging software. After looking around a bit, I chose Greymatter. It was cheap (OK, free), worked on my server rather than someone elses (like Blogger, for example), and seemed pretty stable. Unfortunately, after I got it up and running and customized the way I wanted, I learned that it was discontinued - no new development. Most of the GM users were jumping to other products like WordPress, but I'd just gotten it up and running, so I stuck it out.
I wasn't the only GM user who was disappointed when the development stopped. Several users approached the owner of the software and secured permission to begin development of an upgrade package. That new version was released last week, and naturally I just couldn't wait to install it.
The fact that you're reading these words is proof that they did a pretty good job. We're now running GreyMatter v1.7.1 and are happy as a clam. Dodged the bullet again ...
John Glenn - former senator, former astronaut and all-around man's man - says we're not getting all we can out of the International Space Station. The current space policy, crafted in the wake of the 2003 Shuttle Columbia accident, includes mothballing the shuttle fleet by 2010 in favor of Apollo-like capsules for exploration of the Moon and Mars. Glenn feels that this policy will short-change a very expensive - and very capable - space station.
"To not utilize that station the way I think it ought to be utilized is just wrong," said Glenn, 85 ... "we will not even begin to realize its potential."
He said he supports the president's moon and Mars goals but not at the expense of the space station, which is only two-thirds complete.
NASA and its international partners, including Canada, Japan and Russia, hope to finish the space station in 2010, but no decision has been made to extend its operation past 2016.
The ISS represents a huge investment of time and money on the part of many countries, and we cannot allow short-term policy changes to affect that. We're just now beginning to enter the operational phase as new arrays and modules are installed, allowing for crew expansion and real work to begin. From the short duration shuttle flights, we know the kinds of discovery and innovation that can come from time on orbit - imagine what we will be able to do with years of research time onboard the ISS!
We made a commitment to the ISS - we owe it to ourselves to see it through.
Good news, travel fans! Yesterday, JetBlue Airways managed to fly a full schedule of flights for the first time since a Valentine's Day blizzard left their schedule - and reputation - in tatters. The pictures coming from the JetBlue terminals on the east coast last week weren't pretty - stranded passengers packed like sardines, all clamoring for a seat on a flight ... any flight ... that was heading home. Now the lawyers and the spin doctors and the politicians are involved; you can bet we haven't heard the last of this one.
Here's what I find funny: JetBlue is one of those so-called "discount airlines" that consistently undercut the major carriers. You can pay $600 for a round trip to New York on American, or $199 on JetBlue. For people on a budget - or just plain cheap - that's hard to pass. But do they ever think about why JetBlue and others low price carriers can make this offer? There are certain costs that are pretty much fixed in the airline business - planes and fuel for example (although Southwest is famous for a forward-thinking fuel deal that it cut). Other costs - like pilot salaries - could be cut, but are you sure you want the guy who couldn't get a full-paying job at the big carriers and had to settle for a lower salary to fly you? Sounds like a Bud Light commercial ... "Mr Discount Airline Pilot Guy" ... oh, wait - that was the one that was banned ...
But I digress. Let's assume for a moment that the discount guys don't cut corners on safety, or maintenance, or equipment. Where do you think they make up the difference? Sure, they've cut out meals and blankies and drink service, but so have the others. The only place left is in infrastructure - the unseen folks who keep things running when it gets bad. American Airlines has a logistics center in Fort Worth with 8,000 employees - I doubt JetBlue even has 8,000 employees. So when things go bad for American - and they have (remember 9-11?) - they can develop a recovery plan. When it goes bad for JetBlue, all they can do is wring their hands and talk into the camera.
I do a fair share of travel in my job. Last year, I made six trips around the country, and the worst thing that happened to me was an hour's delay in St. Louis - after they suffered the worst storm in a century and people were using the light of their cell phones to navigate through the terminal! But the airlines managed to keep going.
I always fly major carriers, and I pay extra if required to go non-stop - fewer flights means fewer opportunities to fail. If you choose to try and save a few bucks by flying a marginal airline, why should you be surprised if you get marginal results? Hell, they have a reality series on A&E ("Airline") that is based on the failure scenarios faced by people trying to fly Southwest - why on earth would anyone be willing to go through that?
Now the talk is that Congress will demand a "Passenger's Bill of Rights" insuring certain levels of treatment. Great - who do you think is going to pay for that? Do you really think it will make things better? JetBlue, as part of their PR mea culpa, introduced their own version yesterday. Departure delay? Get a travel voucher. Arrival Delay? Another voucher. Frankly, if I got screwed by an airline, the last thing I want is a discount on a future trip! And you just know that if Congress is involved, we'll get the best possible outcome ... not!
Look, this is just part of the overall greediness of the average American - I want it all, I want it now, and I won't pay for it. It's why our schools turn out generations of uneducated adults, why our power grid is held together with paper clips, and why there's no incentive for business to do anything to improve service if it would result in even the slightest increase in cost.
By know, you've surely heard the story: A distraught, distracted Britney Spears enters a middle-class beauty salon in Tarzana and ask the owner to shave her head. When the owner questions the sanity of her request, Spears grabs the clippers and does the job herself. I'm not going to try and understand what's going on in her head, but clearly the Britney Jitney has jumped the tracks. When your week starts with you dancing on stage with strippers in New York, includes a midweek trip to Antigua to check in to rehab (only to check out the next day), and ends up with a bald head and two new tattoos, you need help bad. It takes a lot to knock Anna Nicole off the front page, but Britney did it. Somewhere, K-Fed is celebrating - he doesn't have enough money to screw up this bad, so it's a cinch he'll get the kids.
I'll leave it to others - and there will be many - to try and figure out just how Britney spun so far out of control. I'm really more interested in the big picture. It seems lately that we see more and more cases of people who simply snap, unable to deal with the reality of their lives. When they do, more often than not, they do so in spectactular fashion. From mailmen "going postal" to school kids with guns to celebrities with infinite wealth and a posse of enablers who weave a death spiral of amazing proportions, it's clear something is wrong.
Naturally, I have a theory. It's called Ecklund's Corollary to the Peter Principle. Any MBA grad can tell you about the PP, developed in the '60s by Lawrence Peter. Simply defined, "in a hierarchy every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence." You achieve results in a particular position, so you are promoted to a more challenging one. You continue to achieve and rise until you reach a position in which you cannot achieve, and there you stay - your own level of incompetance.
Ecklund's Corollary takes the Peter Principle and applies it to modern life. Instead of our position changing, the requirements of the position - life - change. Cell phones, PDAs, text messaging, car pools, day care, play dates, STD, WMF ... life simply gets more and more complex. And at some point, a certain amount of society becomes overwhelmed. That's where the corollary come in: "As the complexity of life increases, so too does the number of people in society who will be unable to deal with the increased complexity, and the magnitude of their catastrophic reaction to that inability." As society moved from horses to cars to planes to rockets, the challenges life brought to bear increased. The threshold of ability needed to master the game of life rose, and so did the number of people unable to reach that threshold. And as they realized their own inability, and felt the pressure to succeed, some of them cracked - in an increasingly explosive and bizarre manner.
Admittedly, many of the most visible cases are people like Britney and Anna Nicole who bring extra pressure on themselves through their pursuit of fame. Maybe they didn't realize the additional challenges their desired lifestyle would bring, or maybe they just didn't care. In the end, though, it doesn't matter - they are just as broken either way.
- A great Daytona 500 - if you were smart enough to wait until the last half-hour of coverage to tune in. No real "Big One", but a lot of "Little Ones" knocked out most of the favorites. Kudos to FOX's Jeff Hammond who, when asked who he thought would win, replied "Tony Stewart - if he has racing luck." He had the car, but not the luck, and ended up in the wall with the rest of them. I feel for Mark Martin, who was thisclose to his first victory after nearly thirty years of trying - only a little wiggle in the final corner let Kevin Harvick inch by. Bet you wish you had that Roush engine right about now, eh, Mark?
- The Rehabilitation of Kobe Bryant continued last night, in Sin City of all places. He wasn't just a player, he was a leader - and was justly rewarded with the MVP. Unlike most recipients, he didn't have to campaign for it. He just did his thing within the flow of the game and dominated. Nice to see Kobe and Shaq have friendly words before the game - it looks like the feud is truly over.
- The Phil Mickelson of old reappeared yesterday on the back nine at Riviera, and it cost him the event. Most will point to his bogey on the 72nd hole, or a poor putt on the final playoff hole with eventual winner Charles Howell III. But I knew it was over earlier when he used a wedge on the green - and chunked a big divot. He may have the best short game in the business, but his head continues to be his biggest liability.
- The last of the MLB squads will report for spring training today - thank God! Say what you want about the popularity of football or basketball, or the difficulties baseball has gone through in recent years, but it is still the national pastime. Everyone was throwing money around like drunken sailors in an attempt to pack their rosters - all, that is, but my beloved Florida Marlins. I'd love to tell you how with that great six-pack of rookies they had last hear, all they had to do was stand pat, but that'd be a lie. They're cheap - bottom line. The likelihood that both Dontrelle Willis and Miguel Cabrera - or either of them, for that matter - will still be with the team come playoff times is unlikely. But that's the life of a Fish fan, I guess ...
Isn't it wonderful when things that are great by themselves come together to form something even better? You know ... peanut butter and chocolate ... puppies and little children ... Paris Hilton and papparazzi ...
Well, here's another example: An iPod and a Sports Illustrated supermodel. The 2007 edition of the SI Swimsuit edition hit the stands this week, and as always, the editors are trying to push the envelope with regards to swimsuit technogy. They've had models in suits made of bottlecaps or candy or snow. They've even gone with suits that are simply painted onto the skin of the model.
They've done themselves proud this year. Let me introduce model Marisa Miller and her "swimsuit" - a video iPod. Just try explaining the tanlines that thing's gonna leave, sweetie ...
Speaking of the SIS, they really jumped the shark this year with their cover shot. Each year, the best and brightest of runway models and swimsuit designers compete for the coveted slot on the cover. It's a huge honor, and can catapult the lucky winner to a meteoric career.
This year's cover model? Not our Marisa here ... nope! It's singer Beyonce' Knowles, in a bikini made by ... her mother. Now, it's not that B isn't an attractive girl, or that her mother is without talent, but c'mon. This position is supposed to be held by professionals, not someone whose label probably bought the slot. Give her a page or two in the middle of the mag, but give us back our cover models!
UPDATE: Courtesy of our friends at goldenfiddle.com, here's a snippet of Marisa explaining the challenges in wearing swimwear by Apple:
There was a time when NASCAR was looked at like the bastard step-brother to the All-American racers at Indy and the tech-savvy rockets of Formula 1. Stock car drivers were seen as nothing more than moonshine runners killing time racing until the next batch came off the still.
No more.
Over the last few years, NASCAR has expanded it's fan base far beyond the southern states. Today, the most popular races (outside the Daytona 500) are in Chicago, Las Vegas and here in LA. Huge amounts of money are being raised by NASCAR as more and more sponsors pay to slap their logo on the side of a car. You just knew it wouldn't take long for the world to notice.
During the past offseason, two events occured that showed just how NASCAR has grown beyond its roots. Juan Montoya - former Indy 500 winner and 7-time F1 race champion - left the European circuit to pilot a stock car for Chip Ganassi. And Toyota - long time nemesis of the American Big Three car manufacturers - announced its intention to join NASCAR as a sponsoring factory.
You can say this for Toyota - they didn't scrimp on the effort. They have three teams and eight drivers, and have gotten a lot of good publicity through their lead team, Michael Waltrip Racing. Armed with a photogenic team leader and a strong team of drivers that includes past champ Dale Jarrett, MWR arrived at the season-starting Daytona Speed Weeks with much promise.
With increased attention comes increased pressure, and the teams of NASCAR are not immune. The need to compete has always led teams to dance that fine line between legal and illegal, and sometimes they find themselves crossing the line. After the qualifying sessions were complete, 4 crew chiefs were fined and suspended for rules infractions. Worse still, the MWR car driven by Waltrip himself was confiscated and torn down. During the process, a compound - said to be a component of rocket fuel - was found in the gas supply. Coming in the wake of the earlier suspensions, the publicity couldn't have been worse. His crew chief was escorted off the premises and Waltrip's car was banned from the race. Without the benefit of owner points (after all, it's a new team), Waltrip was left in unenviable position of having to jump in a car he'd never driven (a backup for one of the other MWR drivers) and try and race his way into the big event during one of the twin Thursday qualifiers. All while serving as the face of the Toyota effort and performing numerous interviews as part of the damage control process.
Give Mike credit. His personal credibility is such that when he said it was the actions of an individual and not the team, people believed him. Even more impressive is the fact that with only 2 spots available for qualifiers in his race, he worked his way from the end of the field up to 8th place to secure a starting spot in the Sunday main event.
I like Mike. His aw-shucks persona is a nice reminder of how things used to be. But don't for a second confuse his goofy grin for a lack of business-savvy. After all, this is the guy Toyota chose to lead a huge NASCAR effort. He claims a lack of knowledge of what went on in his garage, and I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt ... even as I personally find it hard to believe.
The good ol' boys of NASCAR need to understand that the old days are over. Cheating used to be sport in NASCAR, but with all the new money and attention, you just can't afford to push it too far over the edge. Too much is on the line.
Unfortunately, we learned a lot about NASCAR itself in this incident. Waltrip might be a nice guy, but his team crossed the line when they doctored the fuel. If the suits at NASCAR were serious about cheating, they'd have sent MWR packing. But in the end, they understand that their real allegiance lies not with the fans or competition but with the sponsors, who have paid millions of dollars to see their logos go round and round on national TV. At some point, NASCAR will have to grow a pair or they'll see their sport go the way of so many others where sponsor dollars kill credibility.
They say time flies when you're having fun. Well, I have news for you - it pretty much hauls ass no matter what.
Case in point? Yesterday marked the 20th anniversary of the day the greatest rock and roll radio station in the world - KMET-FM here in Los Angeles - ceased to exist. For someone of my generation, that was a tragedy. I grew up with the mighty MET, and it formed the soundtrack of my highschool and college years. I can remember when Jim Ladd - the Lonesome LA Cowboy and subject of Tom Petty's rant "The Last DJ" - got his hands on a copy of the brand-new Pink Floyd album "The Wall" and played it over and over for an entire show. I remember Ladd's playing nothing but John Lennon songs after he was killed - until he disgustedly realized that was the last thing Lennon would have wanted. I spent many a Friday morning at Gazzarri's on the Sunset Strip, having opted to ditch work and drink beer at 6AM with the KMET crew at one of their "Finally a Friday" celebrations. Them's were the days ...
But time moves on. KMET became KTWV, "The Wave" - now well-established and considered the birthplace of the "smooth jazz" concept, and a fine station in it's own right. The air crew scattered, and once in a while you'll see Cynthia Fox or Mary Turner pop up at some event. You can buy real estate from Pat "Paraquat" Kelley - if you can afford it. And of course, you can still find the Lonesome LA Cowboy manning the airwaves each night over at KLOS.
C'mon ... sing it with me - you know the words:
Little bit of heaven, ninety-four-point-seven, KMET ... tweetle-dee!
It's awards season in La-La Land, and everyone who's everyone manages to get an invitation. With ceremonies for music, television, movies - and sometimes all three - happening within a pretty small window of time, you get the chance to see collisions of celebrity worlds ... sometimes in ways you'd never expect.
This is one such example - Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa and celebutant Paris Hilton, conoodling at the Grammys. I'm pretty sure one is interviewing the other for a job, but I'm just not sure who is the interviewer and who the interviewee ...
BTW ... I appreciate anyone who is willing to support a cause, but someone needs to tell Tony that the trendy rubber wristband doesn't go over the cuff ... someone call the Fashion Police!
I'm actually sort of curious just what cause he's supporting - or, more importantly, willing to be seen as supporting. A quick Google search tells me that his purple wristband could be 1) stop animal abuse, 2) ADD, 3) domestic violence awareness or 4) WWJD. Thanks, Lance - you created a monster!
Our friends in the Sea Launch fleet got quite a jolt when things went awry during the recent New Skies 8 launch. While the booster and satellite were a total loss, there was no loss of life or injuries since all personnel were removed from the launch platform Sea Launch Odyssey prior to liftoff.
Early reports indicated that the damage to Odyssey was significant enough to threaten the seaworthiness of the ship, or at least force it to make a stop at a shipyard. I'm happy to report, however, that Odyssey is inbound to the Long Beach Home Port in the company of the command ship Sea Launch Commander. The damage to the ship was minimal considering what it went through, and was limited to the destruction of a blast shield and damage to some hangar doors. As the photo at left shows when you click on it, there's a lot of discoloration aft and the ship has a nice kerosene soot stain all over. Nothing a little elbow grease can't fix, though ...
The talk is that the Zenit's RD-171 engine has been cleared of blame in the incident, and that the most likely culprit is the failure of a liquid oxygen line, leading to depressuration of the system. Think of someone putting a crimp in the fuel line in your car - your engine would choke and you'd coast to a stop. Have that happen when you're heading up, and you'll fall back - fast.
There's a reason they call it rocket science, and every so often we're reminded that the space business can be dangerous. Fortunately, all the damage occured in this incident can be repaired - it just takes money. Lessons will be learned, changes instituted, and soon Sea Launch will be back in the rocket business once again.
Breaking The Grip Of Winter With A Little Eye Candy
These are tough weather times for much of the country. Lake-effect snow in upstate New York ... temperatures below freezing in Minnesota and Wisconsin ... heck, it even looks like it's gonna rain here this weekend. It's hard to imagine that summer is but a few months away.
Fortunately, there are places in this country like Hawaii, where it's always summer, and women like Denise Richards, who is willing to strip down to remind us what summer looks like. Thank God for public service-minded women like her!
Speaking of public service, you'll notice that while I'm happy to share this picture of Ms. Richards and her impressive abs, you won't be seeing her current boyfriend - Bon Jovi guitarist Richie Samborra - any where in the shot. It's true that he gives hope to the rest of us over-the-top-of-the-hill-and-sliding-down-the-back-side guys, but the sight of a pasty-skinned, beer-gutted Samborra walking hand-in-hand with Richards is sufficiently illogical that I'm afraid that if I showed it, the universe would collapse on itself and a new one would spring up in it's place - one where such things could never happen ...
Anna Nicole Smith - stripper, centerfold, "actress", billionaire widow and human train wreck - died today after collapsing in a Florida hotel. She was 39.
Actually, calling Smith's life a train wreck gives a bad name to locomotives everywhere. The story of her life reads like a cheap paperback - a Texas stripper and single mom becomes Playmate of the Year and marries an oil tycoon fifty years her senior. From there, it's years of litigation over the fortune (leading all the way to the Supreme Court), bizarre award show appearances and an even more bizarre hit reality show. Always a tabloid favorite, her up-and-down weight led to rumors of drug abuse.
Last year, Smith's personal life turned dark. First, she gives birth to a daughter in the Bahamas - a daughter whose parentage is still being litigated. Three days later, her son dies in her hospital room from a drug overdose. Smith's then-attorney claimed to be the father of the new child and married Smith in a yacht-borne ceremony that looked more like Mardi Gras than a matrimonial. Only yesterday, a court ordered Smith to produce the now-5-month-old child for testing to determine which of two candidates is the real father.
Obviously, I do not celebrate anyone's death, and I understand there are those who are currently grieving. But this looks like the inevitable end to a long, tragic tale. When you live a life devoid of purpose, morals, self-restraint or self-worth, there just isn't going to be a happy ending. Smith seemed to emulate the blonde bombshell personified Jayne Mansfield or Marilyn Monroe; in the end, she meets the same tragic end.
To say that the media is spinning up for this story doesn't even begin to cover it. Look for the next few days to be all Anna, all the time. It'll be enough to push the "Astro Nut" case off the front page ... almost. This is a tragic story, but spare your tears for the folks you'll be seeing over and over and over in in the media. They're right where they want to be - in front of the camera. If you want to feel bad for anyone in this situation, pity the 5-month girl whose mother is dead and whose father is a mystery.
We as Americans are pretty jaded when it comes to heroes. Our politicians take bribes, our athetes take drugs, and our corporate leaders take profits. There's not a lot for us to believe in.
For nearly a half century, though, there was one group of people we could look to with pride, confident they would be worthy of our adulation - the men and women of the NASA Astronaut Corps. From the original Mercury Seven to the shuttle and space station astronauts of today, they have consistently performed in a manner that brought nothing but glory and acclaim to NASA and Americans. In the history of the space program, there has never been a major controversy.
Until today.
Lisa Nowak flew on the shuttle Discovery last summer and by all accounts is an astronaut's astronaut. A Navy captain and Academy graduate, she is also a wife and mother of three children. By any normal measure, she would look to be a candidate to uphold the proud traditions of NASA.
All of that makes it hard to understand where she is right now. Nowak, 43, was arrested early Monday morning in Orlando, Florida after attacking Air Force captain Colleen Shipman in the airport parking lot. As the details came to light, it got stranger and stranger - this is one straight out of a dime store novel.
Apparently, Nowak had feelings for fellow astronaut Bill Oefelein, feelings that may have led to some level of a relationship with Oefelein and her decision to separate from her husband a few weeks ago. Oefelein, meanwhile, was having a relationship with Shipman, who works with NASA. When Nowak saw flight information for Shipman on Oefelein's computer, she apparently flipped out.
Armed with an array of "weaponry" and wearing the same diapers assigned to orbital crews to minimize her need to stop along the way, Nowak drove the 900 miles from Houston to Orlando, where she accosted Shipman, spraying her with pepper spray before she could get away.
Shipman drove away and found police, who located Nowak at a bus stop. They also found a wig and a plastic bag containing a carbon dioxide-powered BB pistol in a nearby trash can, the report said.
Inside a bag Nowak was carrying, the officer found a tan trench coat, a new steel mallet, a new folding knife with a 4-inch blade, 3 to 4 feet of rubber tubing, several large plastic garbage bags and about $600 in cash, the report said.
Nowak admitted the details of Shipman's story, according to the police report, and permitted a search of her car.
Inside the car, police found an a half dozen latex gloves, MapQuest directions from Houston to Orlando International Airport, e-mails from Shipman to Oefelein, diapers Nowak said she wore to reduce stops along the highway and a letter indicating how much she loved Oefelein.
Initially charged with attempted kidnapping, the charges were raised to attempted murder late this afternoon. Nowak posted bail, and will return to Houston with a GPS anklet that will track her moves.
The dueling press releases have already come out. From Mike Coats, director of NASA's Johnson Space Center in Houston:
"We are deeply saddened by this tragic event. The charges against Lisa Nowak are serious ones that must be decided by the judicial system. She is officially on 30-day leave and has been removed from flight status and all mission-related activities. We will continue to monitor developments in the case."
That sound you hear is Coats pulling the chain to flush Nowak's career.
From the Nowak family:
We are naturally saddened and extremely concerned about the serious allegations being made against Lisa. We love her very much, and right now, our primary focus is on her health and well-being.
I'm not sure there is anything scarier than a woman scorned when the woman is a military-trained Type-A personality. Clearly, something happened in Nowak's brain that made her chain come off the sprocket. It all sounds pretty funny until you realize that she's looking at the potential of life in prison should she be convicted of all charges.
The tabloid media ... er, cable news networks ... have gotten a hold of this one and are running with it as if it were O. J. Nothing they like more than pulling heroes off the pedestal. There's a lot more that will come out over the next few days and weeks ... all we can do is wait and watch.
A couple of weeks ago, we went through one of the worst cold snaps in recent memory. It dropped below freezing for several straight nights, leading to massive crop losses. Here at the Home Office, it got cold enough to ice the cars and kill some plants. As it happened, I had a conference call that week with my software supplier at their home office in Eagan, Minnesota, a Minneapolis suburb. I spent a week there last February and can attest first hand to the fact it gets damned cold there. During our call we compared weather notes, and the Eagan crew pointed out with glee that the overnight low here was lower that it was there.
But what comes around, goes around. Yesterday, the high in LA was 86 degrees - during the first week of February. How was it in Eagan? The high was 2 - and it was snowing.
I'll be thinking about you all when I'm at the beach this afternoon ...
First, let me thump myself on the back - take away a couple of points from each side for the rain and I nailed the score. Now to the rantage:
- Say what you want about the game, but the right team won. On paper, the Colts were superior, and even on a muddy track they were the better team last night. They won the game with their brains, being the first to adapt to the changing conditions and to attach the opponent's weaknesses. Just because the game was stinky doesn't take away from the validity of their championship.
- I was initially in disagreement with the selection of Peyton Manning as MVP, as he didn't really have a Manning-like performance. What he did do, however, is the same thing he did against the Patriots in the AFC Championship Game. He learned from his very first pass that he wasn't going to be able to use the "laser rocket arm" in wet Miami, so he took what they gave - dump and dink to a running back or short West Coast-style crossing routes. A willingness to sacrifice personal glory for the team goal - that a leader, and that's an MVP.
- Everyone wondered if we'd get Good Rex or Bad Rex, but I don't think anyone foresaw getting Putrid Rex. Spotted a pair of touchdowns courtesty of a Hester return and a monster Jones run, Grossman's highlight film for the game was limited to the single short pass he snaked in for the second TD. There pretty much wasn't any portion of his game that was sound - he threw interceptions and dropped snaps like he was the scout team QB - and was clearly in over his head when forced to try and play catch up. The Bears claim that his position is secure, but I don't know how anyone who saw this game - or most of this season - could believe that. Of course, when your only other options are Brian Griese and Kyle Orton, maybe it's not so hard to understand ...
- You just knew that a pair of running backs would stuff the ball down the throat of the defense, but I certainly didn't think that pair would be Joseph Addai and Dominic Rhodes. Rhodes in particular had a career game, going over 100 yards for the first time in several years. The vaunted Bear defense wasn't just bad - they were missing. Linebacker Brian Ehrlacher was good but not great, and the rest of the squad played like graduates of USC's ballroom dancing class. Once it was clear that no one on the Chicago side had any plans to tackle the runners, you just knew that they'd get a solid diet of draw plays - and they did.
- They say that teams tend to take on the personalities of their coach, and never was that more evident that during the first quarter last night. Down 14-6 and seemingly doing nothing right, the cool demeanor of coach Tony Dungy was apparent in his team. No panic, no desperation, just calm resolve to fix the problems and move on. In the end, their failure to panic was the key in overcoming the sloppy start.
- I know it's not manly, but if you have the worst kick return squad in football and you have two weeks to prepare, why in God's name do you let Devinn Hester field the opening kickoff? Six seconds in the game and they were down six points. Fortunately, it did not more damage long-term than Ted Ginn's game-opening return against Florida, but not a great way to start.
- I cringed when I heard Prince would be the half-time entertainment, since nothing makes me more uncomfortable than watching old bands try to regain their past glory ("This Saturday at the County Fair - REO Speedwagon, Journey, Loverboy and Starship"). But Prince was reasonably entertaining and didn't show the ravages of time. Stevie Nicks, on the other hand, needs to be put out of her - and our - misery ...
The weekend's here, and there's a whole spectum of things you could be doing. Cleaning out the garage ... working in the yard ... going fishing ...
Yeah, right. I know what you'd be doing - the same thing I'll be doing: watching the Super Bowl! Don't try to pretend otherwise.
But it's a long time between now and kickoff, and it would be easy to have it slip your mind. You wouldn't want to remember the game sometime in the third quarter, right?
Not to worry - the MB has your back, courtesy of Jessica Alba here and her football. All you have to do is remember "Jessica Alba ... football ... Jessica Alba ... football" Actually, all you have to do is worry about the football part, because once you click on her, you'll have no trouble remembering Jessica ...
OK, I've put this off as long as possible. The Big Game is Sunday, and I have to pick a winner.
Everybody - and I mean everybody - is picking the Colts to beat the Bears on Sunday. The line started out at over 7 points, and hasn't dropped below a touchdown yet. In point spread terms, that's a massacre. Can the game really be that one-sided?
It's really a tale of two match-ups, with a couple of wild cards tossed in. The Colts offense versus the Bears defense is strength on strength. They say defense wins championships, and the Bears squad is world-class, but I just don't see them holding back Peyton Manning all day.
When the ball is going the other way, it's just the opposite. You have two squads that have been iffy all season, and have been getting it done with smoke and mirrors during their playoff runs. The Bears have a solid run offense, but with Rex the Not-So-Wonder-Dog at QB, you never know when the wheels will fall off. It's not that he can't make the plays; rather, he trys to do too much and ends up making plays for the other guys. Meanwhile, the Colts defense languished near the bottom of the chart all season until suddenly righting the ship a couple of weeks back. But how long can that last? The squad that doesn't make the mistake gets the advantage.
That leaves the wild card - the special teams. The Bears have rookie returner Devin Hester and his 5 touchdowns, while the Colts have their offseason pickup, kicker Adam Vinatieri. I'm thinking that Hester can be neutralized somewhat by kick placement, while there's nothing that seems to stop Vinatieri. Give the edge to the Colts - barely.
In the end, it will be a closer game than predicted, but the Colts offense will wear down the Bears defense. Grossman and the Bears offense can help out if they can keep Peyton off the field, but in the end I think it's going to be too much Manning to Harrison.
Discrimination in any form is a hideous thing. Throughout the history of man, discrimination has been used to give one group an advantage or prevent another group from taking on the roles they deserve in society. As we've grown as a people and seen the errors of the past, the court system has been one way to try and right the wrongs of our forefathers. Many significant court rulings have served as the foundation of much of the anti-discrimination sentiment felt on our society today.
The lawsuit, filed by Los Angeles psychologist Michael Cohn, claimed thousands of men and fans under age 18 were each entitled to $4,000 in damages because they were treated unfairly. Women over 18 received the gifts that day.
Fortunately - and frankly, surprisingly - the suit was dismissed. After all, you can't have too high an expectation when it comes to courts in California and common sense.
Personally, I think this knucklehead Cohn should be forced to spend some time on a plantation, or picking lettuce, or serving in one of the many examples of people who have been legitimately discriminated against. Let's see how he feels after that.
It's not easy being a rocker in a hip-hop world. Sure, there's the occasional indie-rock breakout like the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus or Panic! At The Disco and guilty pleasures like Jonesy's Jukebox, but for the most part I'm stuck with the groups of my younger days.
Fortunately, there's some promising news on the classic rock front. First was the announcement that the Police, who've only played together once since their 1983 breakup, will be opening the Grammy Awards ceremony in a couple of weeks. Now, we get word that the Eagles, whose last studio album "The Long Run" was released in 1979 (!), is close to releasing a new disc. Said to be titled "Long Road to Eden", the secret was spilled by Eagles frontman Don Henley during a recent concert.
"It's coming out in 60 to 90 days, if we don't kill each other first," Henley was quoted as telling his audience on Saturday at the MGM Grand Garden Arena.
It's hard to imagine any group being able to release a relevent new album after nearly thirty years (although Steely Dan pulled off pretty much the same thing a few years back), but if anyone is gonna do it, you have to figure the Eagles can. Several new songs have been released in the last few months, and their 2003 9-11 ode "Hole In The World" was a hit.
If a picture is worth a thousand words, then a video must be worth a dictionary. Shortly after Tuesday's Sea Launch booster failure turned our NSS8 satellite into so much confetti, a space-related website posted a clip of the video feed, with a stern warning to not steal the video. Being a upstanding sort of guy, I settled for the screen capture I included in my earlier posting. Fortunately for us, not everyone is as honest as I am, so the video had made its way to YouTube - which means I can share it with you!
Props to the guy in the launch center with his finger on the button who switched to the Sea Launch logo - that guy has a future as a network censor ...
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