Remember This Next Time You Want A Raise

One thing is common among all American workers, no matter how much they make - they all think they should make more. Snivelling to your boss about why you need a raise is considered an art form. Usually, you just get sent packing. In at least one case, though, the employees got a little more than they bargained for.

The owner of a car dealership has been accused of killing two employees because they kept asking for pay raises.

Rolandas Milinavicius has been charged with two counts of murder in the shooting deaths of Inga Contreras, 25, and Martynas Simokaitis, 28. All three are from the eastern European nation of Lithuania but had been living in Atlanta, Georgia, authorities said.

Milinavicius, who was having financial problems, told police he shot the two Thursday after they kept asking for more pay, said police in East Point, which is just outside Atlanta.

"He told us that he was under a lot of stress," East Point police Capt. Russell Popham said. "Unfortunately, he decided to take his anger out with violence."

"As I understand, the employees were not really happy about the pay, and they had questioned him about it over the course of time," Popham said. "That morning he said he just snapped."

I certainly don't want to make light of the deaths of two innocent people, but it just makes you wonder how much pressure people put themselves under to be successful. Also makes you wonder if they have a labor rights organization in Lithuania ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 09:06 AM PST [link]

Sports Rant - Couch Potato Edition

After flying in from Seattle Thursday night, flying out to Reno Saturday morning - and then driving back Saturday afternoon - all I wanted to do on Sunday was collapse. Thank God there was a wide variety of sports to absorb ...

- I'll be honest; I didn't think there was a chance in Hell that the Marlins would escape San Francisco without giving up the record-setting home run to the Giants' Barry Bonds. Surprise! After a rude awakening for Rick VandenHurk (he gave one up to the Pumpkin Headed Freak on his first at-bat of the series), Bonds went homerless in the rest of the games and remains one dinger away from tying the Hammer. Props to Dontrelle Willis and Sergio Mitre for having the stones to go after Bonds - particularly Willis. The D-Train grew up in Oakland as a Bonds fan, and make no attempt to hide the fact that he's in awe of him. But when he took the mound, he rared back and brought it - 12 straight fastballs - that resulted in one strikeout, a pair of pop-ups and a walk. Even Bonds had to smile afterwards - as his manager, Bruce Bochy, put it later, "He saw more good pitches today than he does in most weeks." Now Bonds has to come to LA, and the fans will be ready. "Baaaaaaary .... Baaaaaaary ... Baaaaaaary ..."

- The Tour de France ended yesterday on the cobblestones of Paris and I am forced to admit that I couldn't care less. If ever a sport deserved to be eliminated, at this point it would have to be professional cycling. I have never seen a single sporting event be so riddled with controversy and poor decision-making - it makes the missteps by the NHL look like nothing. In the end, Alberto Contador of the Discovery Channel team took home the title, through attrition as much as talent. To be sure, Contador is a rising star - declared to be "the future of cycling" by no less than Lance Armstrong himself. Contador came to this event looking for the white jersey of the under-24 champion, not the overall title, but as all the favorites were kicked to the curb he was the one left standing ... er, pedalling. A good way to go out for Team Discovery, but a pathetic display overall.

- Congrats to Natalie Gulbis, who won the Evian Masters in a playoff yesterday for her first LPGA victory. Known primarily for her looks rather than her golf, Gulbis was part of that loose group that included Anna Kournakova and Danica Patrick - looks good, can't perform - which wasn't helped by her calender and reality TV show. But she's always had game and had come close before. This could be the beginning of good things for her - which should be good for the LPGA as well. Nice to see a story about someone who actually performs, instead of just showing up. Which reminds me - Michelle Wie actually made the cut.

Posted by MarlinNut @ 10:03 AM PST [link]

Random Eye Candy

Every week I have to make an important decision - which model to feature in the Weekend Eye Candy. I always try hard to make it someone relevant somehow to the date or the season or something, and most of the time I'm successful. I take a lot of pride in the selections, since anyone could slam a picture of a hot chick on their site and call it a day - it takes a true artist to find just the right girl.

Having just returned from Seattle, I thought it appropriate to find someone with a Seattle tie-in. Unfortunately, a Google search showed that all of the hotties in Seattle have either left or gotten old. I suppose I could have pulled out an old picture of Ann Wilson of the Seattle-based band Heart (playing in SoCal tonight, BTW - scary!), but we like to stay more current than that. Try as I may, I just couldn't find the right girl. Not sure if that's an indictment of Seattle or Google, but it is what it is.

But we still need some Eye Candy, so here's professional wrestler and GoDaddy model Candace Michelle. She's from Milwaukee, and her breasts are from Silicone Valley, but it's the best we can come up with for today. Somehow, I don't think there'll be too many complaints.

Posted by MarlinNut @ 01:49 PM PST [link]

And You Think You Have Stupid Relatives ...

I travel quite a bit for business, and I don't mind. The change is nice, and I actually enjoy flying - at least the flying part.

The process of catching a commercial flight has changed quite a bit since 2001. Beyond the lack of empty seats on flights anymore, the whole screening process is really a pain. And yet, as we saw earlier this week when the whole "blocks of cheese" thing was announced by the TSA, there's still the potential for mayhem in the skies.

It would be bad enough if there weren't self-centered assholes who thing the whole world waits to serve them. Our latest example? A guy who wanted to fly out of SEA-TAC last night to Memphis but missed his flight. Now, I'd have made damn sure I was there on time, but even if I wasn't, I'd just suck it up and work with the airline to find another flight. Not this jackhole. He walks up to the counter and tells them there's a bomb on the plane.

All things being as they are, the flight, which was now six miles away from the airport, was forced to return to Seattle and the passengers deplaned for rescreening. Several hours later, they were on their way - no doubt with nothing but good thoughts for their would-be co-passenger. The airport itself was forced to close a runway and route flights elsewhere for several hours - more happy passengers!

Oh, and the guy who started it all? He never did make it to Memphis, but he's now a guest of the Federal government - and will be for some time.

Frankly, I think they should go ahead and send him to Memphis - in the wheelwell of his flight ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 06:18 AM PST [link]

Le Tour De Farce

I'll admit it - even though I consider myself a cycling fan, I don't follow the Tour de France as closely now that Lance Armstrong has retired. That was the reaction predicted by the French organizers two years ago as Armstrong pedaled off into the sunset with his seventh maillot jaune. But, at least for me, it's not for the reasons our French friends thought.

Controversy is nothing new to Le Tour. Long before there was the story of Armstrong and his historic recovery, there were problems with doping on the Tour. Heck, they even had a rider drop dead during a stage as a result of some of the things he'd taken to make himself perform better. But the seven-year hiatus created by Lance and the Big Blue Train made us forget those problems.

Last year, we got a glimpse when several of the biggest names in the sport were linked to a Spanish blood doping scandal and subsequently banned from the event. Later, on the heels of another heroic performance that led to his overall victory, American Floyd Landis was caught up in yet another doping scandal. As a result, he was prevented from defending his TdF title.

For the 2007 event, currently underway in the French countryside, the scandals have hit a new level. Before the race, several competitors were again banned from starting the event because of the clouds that surrounded them. Even though every rider signed a pledge commiting themselves to fairness in the race, two riders - including stage winner and prohibitive favorite Alexander Vinokourov - have tested positive for banned substances and been kicked off the tour.

The biggest bombshell dropped yesterday when race leader Michael Rasmussen was dismissed by his team and tossed out of the race for apparent attempts to dodge drug testing earlier this season. It's become such a joke that they practically have to hand the yellow jersey to a spectator to wear - assuming they're not doped up, of course.

Ironically, with all the shakeups, two members of the Discovery Channel Team - Armstrong's old squad - find themselves near the top of the time sheets. Alberto Contador is leading with Levi Leipheimer in third as the riders compete in the 18th stage this morning. Not a lot of pride in those positions, all things considered. It should be interesting to see the reaction of the French spectators as the riders head into Paris next weekend - I understand tomatoes are in season ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 05:21 AM PST [link]

The Things We Do For A Buck

My meeting is getting very dull, so I thought this would be a good time for a blog entry. We're on Day 2 of a three-day partners meeting here in Seattle (technically, Tukwila), Washington. There are folks from a dozen different Boeing sites, all of whom already use (about half of the people) or will eventually use (the other half, including me) the software we're discussing. I'm in a unique position, in that we just - and I mean just - rolled into production using the main competitor to this particular software package. Unfortunately, corporate policy being what it is, we've been ordered to make the change sometime in the next three years. So while I'm up to my hips making the current software work, I now have to spend a significant amount of time looking at its replacement. It's a lot like trying to learn two different foreign languages simultaneously - and you keep mixing the two up!

On the bright side, the girl at the table in front of me keeps showing off her pink thong - whether accidental or deliberate remains to be seen ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 12:30 PM PST [link]

Saddened, But Hardly Surprised

If you had "2 weeks" in the "Lindsay Lohan Falls Off The Wagon On Her Face" pool, it looks like you get to collect. Lohan was arrested early Tuesday in Santa Monica and faces a series of charges that include driving under the influence and cocaine possession.

OK - show of hands of everyone who's surprised? That's what I thought. Somehow, when you hear that someone coming out of rehab - and wearing an alcohol-monitoring ankle bracelet - heads straight for Las Vegas, you don't expect good news to follow. The fact that she claimed it was "to prove that she could still party without drinking" didn't carry much weight, either.

She's in a world of hurt this time. Among the charges were carrying drugs into a jail facility (she had a baggie of cocaine in her pocket) and driving on an expired license (the charge that famously took down Paris Hilton). She'll need a mighty big shovel to dig out from under this mess, and a microscope to find her career once it's all over. Hey, what did you expect - you let teenage girls run around with a pocket full of money and surrounded by hanger-on who'll facilitate their lifestyle. Gee - some of them fall flat on their faces.

For now, she needs to focus on getting right with the world and herself. There'll be plenty of time to straighten out the rest of it once she's clean and sober ... again ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 05:50 AM PST [link]

A Different Kind of Conservation

Greetings from Seattle!

I'm sitting in my hotel room here at the Doubletree Suites Seattle / Southcenter in the middle of the night making this entry, since it's the only time all day I've been able to break away from the real work I'm supposed to be doing. It's actually a different kind of feeling, since I'm up here to participate in a workshop to support a software suite that will eventually replace the one I've spent the last two years developing. As you might imagine, I'm not a big fan of the decision, so it's hard for me to sit here and not let that interfere with my ability to be a beneficial participant. But I do what I can.

One thing that has made the trip good is the lack of rain. Every time I've been up here in the past, it's been raining, which really impacts your ability - and desire - to do any real sightseeing. With the sun shining today - and the sun not setting until nearly 10PM - I set off to see one of the sights I'd been looking forward to seeing.

Back in 1915, the Army Corps of Engineers created a pair of locks on the Lake Washington Ship Canal to regulate the water level of Lake Washington. As you might imagine, damming such a waterway really pisses off the salmon and steelhead doing their best to head upriver to spawn, so the Corp eventually added a fish ladder to let the fish through. It took a couple of tries, but the one they have today is considered one of the best examples where the public can witness a fish ladder in action - after all, it's right in the middle of Seattle!

I have some great pictures of the dam, the locks and the ladder, but forgot to pack the card reader so they're stuck in the camera. For now, you'll just have to settle for a shot from Google Earth. The lock pair are at the top of the image, and the ladder is between the dam and the south shore of the canal. Being spawning season, we were able to see at least 20 fish make the leaps upstream during our half-hour on site. There's even an underwater viewing room where you can watch salmon and steelhead resting in one of the pools at the base of a ladder "rung" as they prepare for the next jump.

It's pretty easy to see the need for conservation when the fish are travelling through your city. The challenge for those of us who value billfish and recognize a similar need for conservation is to figure out how to make the public just as aware of the plight of these fish even though they are many miles offshore.

Posted by MarlinNut @ 11:29 PM PST [link]

Fly-By Sports Rant

I've got a lot to do before I take off, but I did want to chime in on the weekend sports ...

- Tough choice on Saturday ... do I go down to Long Beach to watch the AVP Women's Finals, or cruise (no pun) over to the Home Depot Center for the Beckham Coronation. Being a typical SoCal guy, I did what typical SoCal guys do - I watched both on TV ...

- It was amazing to see the impact David Beckham had Saturday on the coverage of MLS soccer - even if just for a day. Credit to Becks for recognizing that unless his foot was falling off, it was critical that he at least made an appearance in the game. Credit also to the Galaxy, an also-ran team in MLS that sacked up - at least for one match - and managed to hold English powerhouse Chelsea to a single goal. We got a taste of what Beckham can do when he sailed a 60-yd pass right to the forehead of a downfield teammate - who had absolutely no clue what to do with it! Hey, you gotta start somewhere ...

- Congrats to Padraig VanDeVelde ... er, Harrington ... for pulling out the Open Championship. Carnoustie has taken its share of victims over the years, and for a while it looked like Paddy H would be one of them. I'll remember the sight of his ball bouncing on the bridge across Berry Burn - and damned near making it to the far side - for some time. Good to see a British subject hoisting the Claret Jug, although you can tell there were many English gritting their teeth to see an Irishman be the one. Better than a half-black, half-Thai American, I guess ...

- Scott Olson of the Marlins just keeps digging the hole he's in deeper and deeper. His run-ins with teammates left him with a black eye last year, and he's already been suspended by the team for two games this season. On his first day back from the suspension, he pitches the Marlins to a victory over the Reds. Unfortunately, he decided to celebrate the victory a bit too much, and was pulled over at 3:30 in the morning for a DUI. Rather, he would have been pulled over, except he decided not to stop. He drove the final few blocks home, and plopped his ass in a lawn chair out front of his house. When the cops arrived, he was apparently less than cooperative, so much so that he ended up being tased - ouch! We all like to see a pitcher with fire, but you need to understand when it's appropriate and when it's not. Scott still has a lot to learn.

- Much was made of Danica Patrick and her 2nd-place qualifying effort yesterday at Mid-Ohio, but she threw away the storyline in the first turn. Her rear end started to slide (on the car, wiseass ...), causing her teammate Tony Kanaan to pull up quickly. In the process, Kanaan clipped her other teammate Marco Andretti, resulting in Andretti's car flipping on it's lid. Not a pretty start. Danica recovered to finish fifth, but it's not a good sign. There's a lot of pressure on her to win, much of which she's courted herself, but I think in the end we'll find that she's a competant but not spectacular racer - something the middle of the pack already has in spades. The only question now is how long her good looks and advertising potential will allow her to keep a premium ride.

Posted by MarlinNut @ 07:30 AM PST [link]

Go Figure

I'm flying out to Seattle this afternoon for a three-day conference. I'm in Seattle pretty often, and if there's one thing that's consistent there, it's the rain. Doesn't matter what time of year it is - it's gonna rain. The natives even divide the rain into two types - the tradition rain that you and I know of as rain, and a pervasive drizzle that we would consider to be rain, but they call a normal day.

So, I get up this morning, looking forward to seeing a little rain once I get off the plane. After all, it hasn't rained in SoCal in nearly a year - the worst drought I can remember. I check AccuWeather for Seattle - and it's not gonna rain! Yeah, a little today, but by the time I get into town tonight, it's gonna be dry and stay that way for my entire trip.

I look outside the window - it's raining in LA. First time in God knows how long ... something about a monsoonal flow. Whatever - go figure!

Posted by MarlinNut @ 07:16 AM PST [link]

Respectable Eye Candy

One of our commenters recently bemoaned the lack of "class" in our Eye Candy recently, and, while the target of his ire wasn't our traditional Weekend Eye Candy, it's still a point well-taken.

When you think about it, America is a country of tradition. We like things to stay the way they are, and we celebrate those things that remain constant. We relish patriotism, even as we disagree with our government's policies. We revel in the beach and surfing culture, even as the UV rays are causing cancer and the Beach Boys are dying of old age. And, above all, we revere motherhood - even as overpopulation threatens our very existance.

You're on your own for the patriotism, but I've got you covered for the beach and motherhood. For a while, everyone was wild about Brooke Burke, especially when she was party-hopping for her E! cable travel show. For a few years, though, she's been out of the spotlight - not because of changes in our tastes, but rather changes in her looks. Brooke took time off from her career to become a mommy. Already the mother of two from an earlier marriage, Brooke gave birth in January to a daughter named "Heaven Rain". As you can see from this recent shot of her enjoying a day at the beach with new husband David Charvet (a graduate of "Baywatch" - so I guess he'd be at home on the beach!), it would appear that motherhood does a body good!

I said earlier that you were on your own for the patriotism thing, but if you don't feel like saluting once you check out Brooke, you probably ought to check your blood pressure - you're more than likely dead ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 08:38 AM PST [link]

Doggone Disgusting

Mike Vick - you are so screwed!

As a species, homo sapiens has shown itself to be capable of great things. We've split the atom; visited the moon; cracked the DNA code. We've cured disease, shown compassion for our fellow man, and worked to save endangered species (when we choose to ...). All in all, as a species we can do amazing things.

As individuals, however, we can still be such dumbasses.

Michael Vick was raised in a difficult part of the world - the tough streets of Newport News, Virginia. No doubt, he had to see and experience things most of us never will. No one would have blamed him if he entered the same downward spiral that claimed so many others from his same situation.

But Vick was a talented athlete, and his gifts let him rise above his upbringing. From the grassy fields of Virginia Tech to the artificial turf of the Georgia Dome, his football skills gave him the opportunity to break not only himself but his entire family free from the shackles of poverty. His signing with the Atlanta Falcons in 2001 represented a opportunity, a new dawn, for the entire Vick clan.

If only he had chosen that path.

The money Vick received with his first contract with the Falcons could have been spent bettering those around him - homes, cars, educations. Instead, it is charged that Vick used the money to set himself up as a major player in a different kind of "sport" - dog fighting. Now, I'm from Southern California, and I realize that there are activities that are traditional in other parts of the country that I don't necessarily understand. But we're not talking about running a little shine or noodling for catfish - these guys breed dogs for the specific purpose of fighting to the death - all for the entertainment of those in attendance. Can there be a more pathetic display of disdain of one species by another?

It would appear that Vick's past has caught up with him now, as he has been indicted by the federal government for his dogfighting activities. And, unlike most of the other athete-related criminal charges that are all too prevalent in our society, this one includes a stiff penalty. After all, the feds don't come after you unless they have a damned good case. Vick will fight the charges with all the money he has left after his kennel career, of course, but there won't be a happy outcome to this story.

Beyond the dead and maimed dogs, the folks who are really screwed in this deal are those with a financial stake in Vick's on field performance. The Atlanta Falcons, who have molded their team around Vick's unique combination of skills, suddenly find themselves with an absentee quarterback - and they traded their primary backup to the Texans during the off season. Now they'll have to turn over the keys to the franchise to some quickly-signed castoff from another squad. Also, Nike announced yesterday that the impending release of a Vick-endorsed shoe line would be delayed indefinitely; I guess the saying, "Man, my dogs are killing me" takes on a whole new meaning when you're wearing Vick autograph model sneakers.

There's an old saying - "You can take a man out of the country, but you can't take the country out of a man." We've seen over and over that athletes with difficult backgrounds just can't leave the past behind, even when they have the financial resources to separate themselves. To the list that includes Mike Tyson, John Daly, Lawrence Phillips and Pacman Jones, you can now add Mike Vick. It really is sad.

More to come on this one ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 08:05 PM PST [link]

For God's Sake, Girl - At Least Try To Be Normal!

I can't speak for everyone, of course, but I think most people who see a celebrity trip and fall under the pressure of stardom (whatever that is), genuinely wants to see them get back on their feet. Now, admittedly, some of us just want to see them get up so we can watch them fall again (what I call the "Kathy Griffin Factor" ... ), but for the most part people want them to do well. After all, while it's not always for worthy reasons, most celebrities are idolized in our culture. We look to them for fashion tips and new trends and other really important things, so we need to see that if we follow their example, we won't end in rehab.

No fall from grace has been more disturbing than one-time pop princess Britney Spears. From the marriages to the divorces to the shaved head to the rehab stint, we've watched her with the same anticipation as a pending train wreck. You'd like to think that, having hit some kind of bottom and spent her time alone in the Promises rehab center, she'd be living some kind of normal life.

As if. Here we see Miss Spears over the weekend. Good lord, the list is nearly too long to cover. The hideous pink wig that covers her own hair's attempt to regrow (BTW - it's been something like 5 months since she shaved her head ... wouldn't you think she'd have enough natural hair to ditch the wigs and at least have some kind of a Hamill bob - unless she's still shaving her head ... just a thought). The Starbucks fat bomb and cigarettes deftly held in one hand. The new $3,000 Yorkie puppy in the other (for which she's getting hammered by the SPCA - start the death watch now). The brassiere that's apparently still sitting on the dresser.

As Susan Powter would say, "Stop the madness!". And if you've seen Powter lately, you'll know just how scary it is that she's seen as more normal than Spears ...

UPDATE: Good news! Apparently, Britney is a MB reader, and in fact saw the post above. Unfortunately, by the time it filtered through the burlap sack she calls a brain, our message of concern had translated into "I think I'll strip down to my bra and panties and go swimming in front of all tha paparazzi. I guess we should be grateful she was at least wearing panties ...

We should give her credit though, for remaining true to her roots (no, not those ones). After all, nothing says "hillbilly deluxe" quite like scratching your ass in public ...

Oh, Brit-Brit - where would we be without you!

Posted by MarlinNut @ 09:04 AM PST [link]

And You Think You're Tough?

Those who play other forms of "football" around the world, whether English or Australian style, chuckle when they hear American footballers described as "tough". After all, our guys wear helmets and pads and flak jackets, while the others pretty much just wear shorts. But if there's anyone out there that can trump those serious footballers, its a rugby player. Just in case you needed to be reminded, let us speak of Ben Czislowski.

Ben plays for Wynnum out of Brisbane, Australia. During a match against Tweed Heads (BTW - gotta love the names!), Czislowski butted heads with forward Matt Austin, resulting in the need for stitches in Czislowski's forehead. That would be the end of an otherwise typical rugby tough guy story, were it not for the aftermath.

Czislowski later suffered an eye infection and complained of lethargy and shooting pains in his head.

Then last week, his doctor found a tooth embedded in Czislowski's head.

"I can laugh about it now, but the doctor told me it could have been serious, with teeth carrying germs," Czislowski said. "I've got the tooth at home, sitting on the bedside table," he said. "If he [Austin] wants it back he can have it. I'm keeping it at the moment as proof that it actually happened."

Makes some wide receiver and his pulled groin look pretty silly, doesn't it. Come to think of it, a pulled groin was already silly ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 11:10 AM PST [link]

Oh, Look - A Sports Rant!

Baseball's settling back in after the All-Star Break, motorsports are hitting their midseason, and football camps are about to open. And who's this guy who claims to be a footballer who uses a round ball???

- The Giants' Barry Bonds basked in the All-Star limelight in the only city where he could find such love. But now the games have started again, and Bonds is back to reality - and being Barry. Mired in an 0 for 20 slump, he went hitless against the hated Dodgers as they swept the Giants on their own field. How did Barry respond?

"It's an embarrassment for me to be wearing this fucking uniform 'cause of the way I'm playing. There, that's it. Now go away."

Now, there's the Barry we all love to hate. None of that touchy-feely crap any more. Just the Pumpkin-Headed Freak and egotistical quest for immortality. Of course, he's running on fumes right now, so while he'll break Hank Aaron's record, he won't break it by much. And he'll never feel the love Hammer did ...

- Still talking baseball, the Philadelphia Phillies lost yesterday, marking 10,000 losses in franchise history. They're the first professional sports franchise to make that mark, and the press has been all over it. My question is, why? All it shows is that they've been around for ever (125 years, in this case). Stick around long enough, and you're bound to lose games. If the Phillies hit 10K losses, then someone out there must be at 10K victories - why isn't that a story. Oh, wait - that would be good news, and the press can't report that!

- Everyone thought Phil Mickelson was going to go into this week's British Open on a high. He was leading going into the final round of the Scottish Open, his wrist apparently healed, his swing seemingly flawless. But once again, the part of his body that Butch Harmon can't fix - Phil's brain - jumped in the path of victory once again. He bogeyed the 18th hole to fall into a tie, then lost the event on the first hole of a playoff. Maybe he's shake it off - after all, compared to other Mickelson Meltdowns this was pretty tame - but they will be playing at Carnoustie this week. Beyond being the hardest of the courses on which the Open is played, it's also the site of Jan Van De Velde's famous 1999 meltdown. Here's hoping Phil doesn't follow his lead.

- Tired of stories about a certain primadonna female golfer who got way too much money way too young while achieving way too little? Then you'll like this. During the US Women's Open, one of the great stories was about Alexis Thompson, who at 12 years old, became the youngest player to ever qualify for the event. Had she done nothing more, it would have remained memorable, but it became legendary yesterday when she defeated the current US Women's Amateur champion to capture the Junior PGA Championship. She ran off 4 birdies in 5 holes to clip Kimberly Kim by one shot. The handlers of Michelle Wie should take note - this is how you raise a young golfer. Support them, train them, love them, and ultimately let them do their thing. Don't try and turn them into some kind of sideshow freak.

- Beckhammania arrived on Friday with the press conference announcing their arrival in Los Angeles. Sure, David Beckham will have some effect on soccer in the states, but it is Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham who's garnering all the headlines. Even the seemingly proper Los Angeles Times ran a full cover shot of Posh in their "Image" section accompaning an article on how you, too, can be "posh". Buckle up, folks, it's gonna be a wild ride ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 01:13 PM PST [link]

Transformational Eye Candy

As our part of cashing in on the blockbuster "Transformer" movie, we bring you as this weekend's Eye Candy one of the stars of that new flick, Megan Fox. Believe me, if you've seen her in the movie, you'll never be able to think about looking under the hood of your pickup the same way again.

Also new this week is our first 3-way Eye Candy - three shots of the same girl. Now that isn't intended to pique your libido as much as to make a point, that being the need for adult supervision. Ms. Fox, who is 21, is apparently a creative type - not that surprising for an actor. But unlike you or I, who might, after a burst of creativity write down a few notes on a scribble pad, Megan apparently chooses to do so on her body.

Celebrity ink is nothing new - just look at Angelina Jolie, Alyssa Milano and many others. But usually they're using their body as art - not a Post-It pad. Fox has a quote from Shakespeare on her shoulder, and some self-penned (and amazingly pointless) poetry running down her ribcage. I won't even mention the portrait of Marilyn Monroe on her forearm or the presence of her boyfriend's name just below the bikini line - a tat she got after only dating him for three months.

But none of that matters now. What does is that she's hot, she's now and she's our Weekend Eye Candy!

Posted by MarlinNut @ 05:56 AM PST [link]

Calamari, Anyone?

We arrogantly assume that, as the apex predators on this planet, we know all and control all. Every once in a while, nature reminds us otherwise - which, frankly, is refreshing.

Giant squid are our equivalents in the deep ocean - the big dog, the head cheese. We very seldom see them - so seldom, in fact, that until quite recently they were considered to be more myth than fact. Only through the occasional washing up on the beach of a squid carcass do we get to see just what a mammoth beast it really is.

One such animal wound up on a beach on Tasmania's western coast yesterday. Measuring 26 feet long and weighing in at 560-lbs, you gotta think it can hold it's own against anything it might encounter in the seas - including you and I.

I know what you're thinking, but forget it. Giant squid maintain a high level of ammonia in their mantle to aid in buoyancy, which would leave quite an aftertaste in your mouth ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 04:21 PM PST [link]

And You Thought A Mooring In Avalon Was Pricey ...

Living in SoCal, it takes a lot to shock me when it comes to real estate prices. I've watched the price of my duplex triple during my decade of ownership while doing nothing more to improve it other than mow the lawn, and seen similar properties torn down to make way for a pair of $1.2 million mansion cubes. Nope, overpriced real estate is nothing new to me.

But even I found this one surprising. In Los Angeles, with space being at a premium in the better areas, the size of a building tends to be dictated by the parking that the builder can offer. As a general rule, planning committees in LA and the various suburbs won't let a developer go any bigger than the amount of off-street parking spaces they can provide to their tenants. Apparently, that's not so in New York (and several other big cities), where that condo you just dropped a bundle on may not come with parking. That doesn't mean parking isn't available - just be prepared to pay more for the concrete you car sleeps on than the bedroom you sleep in.

Manhattan real estate agent Tom Postilio said there is a waiting list of seven or eight people hoping to pay $225,000 for one of five private parking spaces that has been approved in the basement of 246 West 17th Street, a 34-unit condo development scheduled for completion next January.

The developer of that building is seeking permission to add another four spots, and Postilio said the addition spots are likely to cost even more than the current price, although he could not give an exact price.

"Supply and demand being what it is, there's probably going to be an increase."

On the bright side, they'll probably let you chain up your bike for $10 grand ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 07:25 AM PST [link]

Bucking For A Darwin

Here at the MB, we love the Darwin Awards - you know, the ones that reward acts that are fatally stupid. Every couple of months, a good example crosses our desk ... like this guy.

Kent Couch of Bend, Oregon, decided he wanted to fly to Idaho, but opted for a different way than you or me. Apparently, higher education hasn't reached Bend, yet, or perhaps Couch has spent too much time on the ... couch ... watching reality TV. Why? Because he decided to fly to Idaho using 105 helium balloons and a lawn chair ...

With instruments to measure his altitude and speed, a global positioning system device in his pocket, and about four plastic bags holding five gallons of water each to act as ballast -- he could turn a spigot, release water and rise -- Couch headed into the Oregon sky.

Nearly nine hours later, the 47-year-old gas station owner came back to earth in a farmer's field near Union, short of Idaho but about 193 miles from home.

"When you're a little kid and you're holding a helium balloon, it has to cross your mind," Couch told the Bend Bulletin. "When you're laying in the grass on a summer day, and you see the clouds, you wish you could jump on them," he said. "This is as close as you can come to jumping on them. It's just like that."

The scary thing is that this wasn't the first time he'd tried it. An earlier test flight ended after 6 hours when he began to descend uncontrollably and had to parachute to safety. You'd think that'd be enough to end that particular dream.

SoCal residents may recall an earlier unconventional balloonist named Larry Walters who in 1982 flew a similar contraption to a height of 16,000 feet over Long Beach. He got in trouble with the FAA for interfering with airline traffic patterns and was fined. It is perhaps telling that he later committed suicide in 1994.

Start the watch on Couch ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 05:14 PM PST [link]

All-Star Musings

Say what you want about the rise of football and basketball - baseball is still the Great American Pastime, and I'm definitely a baseball guy. I'd always choose to watch a matchup of two Double-A baseball squads over the last game of the NBA Finals. It's particularly true when it comes to the various All-Star games. I'd rather pull out my fingernails than sit through the NFL's Pro Bowl, but last night, I was happily perched on the couch enjoying the MLB All Star Game from San Francisco ...

- OK, I admit it ... I may hate the bastard and all that he stands for, but every time he came up to bat, I joined the rest of America in screaming "C'mon, you pumpkin-headed freak - put one in the bay!" ...

- I knew going in that it wouldn't be much of an evening for a Marlins fan, what with only one representative on the NL squad - and that one limited to a pinch-hitting role due to an injury. But I really expected more out of Miguel Cabrera than a weak strike out. The Mets' Jose Reyes is a fine shortstop, but I couldn't help but wonder how that 9th inning rally might have gone if Hanley Ramirez and his red-hot bat had been inserted into the lineup back in the 6th ...

- Sports has provided some amazing moments, and baseball has surely had it's share. But all of the best baseball moments are the ones that aren't scripted. Remember Ted Williams mobbed by the All-Stars in Boston shortly before his death? How 'bout Cal Ripkin being forced by his teammates to take a victory lap around Camden Yards after his record-setting consecutive game? The Super Bowl can get away with contrived moments, because we accept it as part of the event. But everyone else - whether the Daytona 500, the Kentucky Derby, or the MLB All-Star Game - should stick to their knitting. All the distractions last night, from Counting Crows before the game to Paula Cole singing "God Bless America" on the field during the 7th inning stretch to that lame attempt to recreate the Williams moment substituting Willie Mays, only served to muddle the affair.

- Speaking of the 7th inning stretch ... I'm as patriotic as the next guy. When I attend the game, I doff my cap and belt out the Star-Spangled Banner like I was on American Idol. I even know the unofficial last two words to the song ("Play Ball" ... ). But please ... please ... stop with the "America the Beautiful" singing during the stretch. Yeah, it was nice to see in the wake of 9-11, when our spirits were shattered and there were still smoking holes in Lower Manhattan. But it's 2007, and it's long since time to move on. With all that's going on in the world now, one of the most patriotic statements we can make is to flip the would-be terrorists the finger by gathering in public to enjoy a ball game. Every time we do something that highlights how different things are - or appear to be to some - we embolden those who would do us harm. Take a page from the British, who mourn the dead on a blown-up bus - and then get right on the next one. We should never forget, but we must move on. The ultimate victory is to show those who would do us harm is that they cannot change our way of life, and the way baseball can do that is by singing the only song that should be sung during the stretch - "Take Me Out To The Ballgame". Save the phony patriotic posing for the politicians.

Posted by MarlinNut @ 08:03 AM PST [link]

Sure Sign Of The Apocalypse II

There's a long and proud connection between music and social causes, a link perhaps most apparent with the charity concert. From the Concerts for Bangladesh to Live Aid to Farm Aid to last year's Live Eight, there have been great events for great causes.

Live Earth isn't going to be remembered as one of those. The series of concerts, held around the world on Saturday, went over with a thud. Now it could be the fact that folks like The Who's Roger Daltrey and Sir Bob Geldof - the organizer of both Live Aid and Live 8 - came out against the events, lambasting them for a lack of purpose. Or it could be that people find it hard to get excited about global warming when the rock stars making the statements came to the event in private jets and limosines.

Personally, I think the problem is that the lineups pretty much sucked. Nothing personifies the forgettable nature of the shows than this picture of Madonna - yes, Madonna - trying to play a Gibson Les Paul electric guitar. I used to think that the worst possible fate for such a proud instrument was to be smashed against a drum riser by some second-rate rock star. Wrong. How the ground didn't open up and swallow her is beyond me. I guess the Rock Gods were too busy retching at the performance by the reformed (and should have stayed retired) Police ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 06:21 PM PST [link]

Monday Sports ... Er, Marlins Rant

Normally, I'd be talking about the sports of the weekend, but today I'm going to concentrate on a single sports story - my beloved Florida Marlins.

I had the chance to see the Fish up close and personal Saturday evening as they played the home team out at Dodger Stadium (BTW - note to stadium designers: You all try to capture the lore of the old stadiums in your new designs, but Chavez Ravine still kicks your asses ... pure simplicity and beauty and the best centerfield view in baseball). The Marlins have struggled this year - they're better than they were at the beginning of last season, but nowhere as good as they were at the end. Injuries hurt, but I think we're learning that some of the young guys from last year's magical run just aren't as good at we thought. Even some of the "vets" deserve criticism, as voiced in a piece from the Miami Herald:

Scott Olsen never will be a No. 1 or No. 2 starter - ''He's not a leader by any stretch of the imagination" ... Miguel Cabrera's weight is a concern - ''He's playing himself into the outfield or first base" ... Dontrelle Willis' "slider is better than two years ago, but he's not commanding his fastball as well as the past, especially in against right-hander hitters. There's no one thing consistently he's having confidence in.'' ... Doubts persist about Jeremy Hermida. Said one scout: ''He doesn't handle the ball in or balls down and away. He's supposed to handle the ball up and over the plate really well, and he isn't [consistently].

On the bright side, they love Hanley Ramirez and Dan Uggla. The story of Uggs as a Rule V pick is one of the feel-good tales of the last few years, and anyone who sees Ramirez play quickly realizes he's one of the best - if not the best - overall players in the game today. He didn't disappoint this weekend in LA, either - he had 2 homers and drove in the winning run Friday night and followed that up Saturday with a 4 for 4 performance.

My personal take after watching them is that they're a young, raw team with some talent and some dead weight. I think what they really need is some decent coaching, because for every physical mistake they made, they made several mental ones - especially in base running. Just no excuse for that. But they did take two of three, including my game with a 7-2 score. Anytime you can watch your team crush three homers, it's gonna be a good day. But they'll struggle to finish at .500 this year, and I think we'd better get ready to see the D-Train pull out of the Miami station before the trade deadline.

Posted by MarlinNut @ 10:55 AM PST [link]

Rev Up Your Eye Candy

It's a holiday weekend, so here's my present to you - double your Eye Candy pleasure!

Here in the States, motorsports are relegated to minor league levels - well, except for NECKCAR - but in Europe it's a big deal. Formula 1, Superbikes, Sedan races - all pull huge crowds and lots of sponsor money. The cars are plastered with logos, and the tracks with banners, but those crafty Euros are always looking for another way to attrack attention to their product. And they've found it in the grid girls.

Attend your typical race in America, and you'll see a bunch of men in firesuits running around. But if you hang out at a European track, you'll see something entirely different - particularly before the race starts. Mingling amongst the drivers and those with special access that gets then down on the starting grid just before the race are lots of scantily clad women - emphasis on scantily - whose primary purpose is to attract the attention of the many photographers covering the race. Sure, you might be getting paid to shoot pictures of Team McLaren, but you always have a few shots for a pretty girl! Much like an American stock car, these girls shamelessly plug whatever brands they've been hired to advertise. You might not remember who won the race, but I'll bet you'll remember the girls.

I have a couple of examples here. These girls were at a recent race, serving to remind you to buy your Bridgestone Tiires. I get the message girls, believe me ...

As Brother Jimi Hendrix once put it, "Tire tracks up and down my back, I can see you had your fun" ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 06:09 AM PST [link]

Thanks For Your Support, Son ...

Imagine how it must be right now to be Al Gore Sr.

You were Vice President for 8 years, a heartbeat away from leadership of the strongest country in the world. You are elected President by the popular vote, only to have a pesky Supreme Court decision give to the other guy. You spend years rehabbing your image, hoping people will forget the whole "I invented the Internet" thing. You reinvent yourself as an environmentalist and leading expert on global warming. You get an Oscar for your work in a documentary film on the subject. You help arrange a worldwide series of concerts to occur this Saturday that will provide additional focus on the plight of the environment. You go on a press junket to support the concerts, starting with Larry King Live tonight.

And all anyone wants to talk about is how your son was arrested yesterday.

In what is apparently a repeat offense, Al Gore Jr. was stopped early on the morning of the 4th for barreling down the 405 at 100 miles an hour. In the car with him was a "personal use amount" of marijuana and several unlabeled containers of prescription narcotics. Needless to say, young Al got a free ride to jail.

Al Sr will survive this embarassment, and hopefully his concerts will achieve their goal. I'm less certain of Al Jr, particularly when I hear he's "gone into treatement" - celeb code for "is hiding from the press at an undisclosed location only until the story cools off". Frankly, if I was someone who had truly used rehab to solve an addiction problem I'd be as irritated at folks like Gore and Lohan and Spears as a true college graduate should be at someone who got their degree over the internet.

On the bright side, when arrested for speeding Gore was at least driving a hybrid Prius ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 07:47 PM PST [link]

Happy Birthday, America!

Some of your joints are getting a bit creaky (especially those in the democracy region), but you look pretty good for 231!

Turn up the volume and click on the box below for your own personal fireworks show.

Remember - everything in moderation ... especially the beer and brats!

Posted by MarlinNut @ 06:40 AM PST [link]

Champ, Champ* or Chump

OK, all you Barry Bonds haters out there - time for a reality check:

Some time in the next couple of weeks, a pitcher will leave a ball a little too far out over the plate. Barry Bonds will stiffen his right leg, rotate his hips, and drive that chunk of horsehide 400-feet plus into the stands - or the bay. He'll jog the bases and the moment he touches home plate will become the MLB all-time career leader for home runs with 756.

It's inevitable. Short of a house falling on him - or a career-ending injury in the All Star Home Run hitting contest - Bonds will smash the record and go on to add another 15 or so by the end of the year. You can call him names, you can throw needles on the field, whatever - the facts are the facts.

Let's be clear (no pun) - I dislike Bonds as much as any professional athlete I've ever seen. To me, he represents everything that is bad in pro sports: he's a self-centered primadonna in a team sport, he's a documented cheater, and he's a world-class asshole. But he's also probably the best to ever lace up a set of baseball spikes.

History will regard the years from 1995 to 2002 as baseball's "steroid era", a time when unnatural acts occurred that are out of line with the other baseball statistics. It's not the first time, though - the mid-sixties saw the "dead ball era" when pitchers had an incredible advantage (remember Denny McClain's 30 win season?). And don't forget the impact that changing the season from 148 to 162 games had. There's no question in my mind that the best baseball story of the 90's - the duel between Mark McGuire and Sammy Sosa to unseat Roger Maris as the single season HR record holder - was steroid fueled. It was Bonds own jealously over the attention the two received that lead him to BALCO and the cream and the clear. But it is what it is. You can no more excise the "dirty" records from baseball than you can find an particular grain of sand on the beach. It is what it is, and we have to live with is. All that remains now is how to react to it.

Henry Aaron has said that he won't be at the game when Bonds sets the record. That smacks of petulance, but it's Hammer's call. Major League Baseball doesn't have that luxury. Record-breaking events of the past have set the standard for how to behave, and Bud Selig and Co have no choice but to stick to the script, no matter hot unpalatable.

Remember back in 1984 when the Los Angeles Raiders won the Super Bowl? NFL Commissioner Pete Rozelle had been trading lawsuits with Raiders owner Al Davis for nearly a decade over Davis' desire and eventual decision to relocate his team from Oakland. Rozelle would have rather stuck his hand up a dog's ass and pull out a steaming handful than have to shake the hand of Davis, but Pete understood his role. He bit down hard, put on his best smile, and handed the Vince Lombardi trophy to a gloating Davis.

That's exactly what Selig needs to do. His waffling on whether he will attend the game or if MLB will even recognize the event makes him look like an ass. Sometimes, the job requires difficult actions, and this is one of them. Suck it up, Bud. Grow a pair and do the right thing. Show up at the game, applaud politely, and acknowledge the magnitude of the event. History will provide all the judgement that Bonds requires and deserves - for now, respect the traditions of baseball and do your job.

Posted by MarlinNut @ 06:52 PM PST [link]

So Much For Artistic Integrity ...

Music has always been a way to communicate to the masses. Whether singing for protest, or patriotism, or social change, pop music in particular has been an effective tool for spreading a message. Now, alongside the protest song and the rally song, we can now place - wait for it ... the advertising song.

Stacy Ferguson - AKA "Fergie" of the hip-hop group Black Eyed Peas, is another in the long line of "I can't sing but I have implants and that's enough to get a record contract" female singers that blight the charts today. Unlike many of her contemporaries, she has principles - she won't sing advertising jingles. She will, however, turn some of her songs in to commercials for product - if the price is right.

The Black Eyed Peas singer will write and perform songs about clothing firm Candie's, which are expected to appear on her second solo album.

An executive at Fergie's record label Interscope says, "With record sales in decline, you must find novel ways to make money out of the music. The trick is to make the brand part of the song so that it slips down easily rather than chokes the fan.

That is so pathetic I don't know if I should comment or vomit - I have a strong desire to do both.

There was a time when artists fought to maintain creative control of their product so that it could not be cheapened by using it for advertising. Hell, John Fogarty of Creedence Clearwater Revival sacrificed nearly two decades of his career just to make a point. Fergie, apparently, has no such problems.

It's worth remembering that there's a term for someone who sells themselves for money in this fashion - "whore" ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 01:06 PM PST [link]

Class Is As Class Does

Oh, it's gonna be a good day for stupid news ... I can just feeeeel it ...

Alex Rodriguez hasn't had an easy time since he was traded to the New York Yankees. He's wilted under the twin pressures of the media spotlight and the weight of his massive contract, and at times the local fans wanted to string him up from the flagpole in center field. He's certainly not done anything to make things better, playing at times during his NY tenure like a second-rate player on a triple-A team.

I assumed that his poor performance had just been an accident - a result of his best efforts that simply fell short. But now I'm starting to wonder if he's trying to deliberately sabotage his place with the Yankees just to get out of town.

It all began with the playoffs last year. A-Rod had a solid season, but folded like a house of cards during the post-season. This year, he's right back to being solid - hell, he's looking like a Hall of Famer at times. Unfortunately, that's meant the fans are warming to him, and he can't have that for his plan to work. Time for Plan B.

First it was the picture of Rodriguez returning to his Toronto hotel with an unidentified blonde who later turned out to be a local stripper. Then it was the expletive-laced tirade towards the press when they tried to photograph him with his family. Now he's unleashed a new bomb - an F-bomb, to be exact.

Rodriguez's wife Cynthia attended the Yankees game on Sunday. Sitting in the family section with their 2-yr-old daughter, fans in the rows behind her were shocked to see her fashion choice. On the back on her wife-beater tank top, in an old English script, was a catchy two-word phrase. The second word was "You", the first started with "F" and rhymed with "schmuck", which is exactly what Rodriguez is quickly turning out to be. Now, Yankee stadium, like most family-friendly venues, has a policy prohibiting the wearing of clothes or holding of signs with obscene statements or pictures, but apparently no one wanted to challenge Mrs $252 million.

She may be "Cynthia" now, but I'm betting she was just "That Skank Cindy" before she cashed her Lotto ticket and married A-Rod in 2002 ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 06:06 AM PST [link]

If It's Monday, This Must Be A Sports Rant ...

OK, I know the real sports you want to rant about - billfish! And since the first SoCal marlin and the first swordfish of the 2007 season were caught on Saturday, you'll definitely want to be checking out the Fishing News tonight for all the details. But there is other sports in the world ...

- The Major League Baseball All-Star rosters were announced yesterday, and there were few surprises. At the head of the list would be the election by the fans of Barry Bonds of the Giants as a starting outfielder for the National League squad. Alfonso Soriano of the Cubs had the spot, but a late-minute charge pushed bongs over the top. Now I know what you're saying, but remember - this is a fan-oriented game. Love him or hate him, Bonds is the big draw. After all, the game is being played in San Francisco, Bonds is the only decent player on the host team, and - like it or not - Bonds is about to set the career record for home runs (more on that later this week). It's the right thing for baseball to have Bonds on the field for an All-Star Game held in his own home park. The real question is whether Big Head Barry will see this as the image-rehab opportunity that it is. Smile a bit, sign some autographs, participate in the Home Run Hitting contest - just have a good time. It could go a long way towards making people forget about the clear and the cream.

- We've said it before (here, here, here, here ... ) but Michelle Wie absolutely needs to get away from the game for a while. Sure, her wrist is hurting, but it's her head that needs the most work - and could be the hardest to heal. It wasn't that long ago that she was the Next Great Thing; now she's been reduced to being a sideshow freak. Even her fellow players are taking notice - when an unnamed player saw a group of reporters surrounding Wie after she left the course on Saturday, she was quoted as saying, "what did she do - quit again?" She's a competitor, and I respect that, but she's doing herself no good now. She's only 17 and has lots of seasons ahead of her; for now, she just needs to shut it down. Take the summer to be with her friends, head off to Stanford in the fall, join a sorority, chase some boys, just enjoy life and rest the wrist. Golf will still be there next year.

- Is it just me, or has NASCAR become the International Race of Champions? You remember IROC, right? Take a dozen identically prepared cars, assign them randomly to a group of elite drivers from different race series, and let them race. Other than the occasional surprising performance by an oval driver on a road course, it ended up being a parade - and a boring one at that. NASCAR used to be an interesting series, where innovation was respected. Heck, one of the favorite saying about NASCAR - right behind "Rubbin' is Racin'" was "If you ain't cheatin', you ain't tryin'". But as the money has gone up and NASCAR has tried to shed it's hillbilly roots, there's no room at the inn for innovation. It was one thing when they established templates that every car had to adhere to, but now you can't even modify things between the templates - just ask Jeff Gordon and Jimmie Johnson, who both got hit with fines for unauthorized modifications a couple of weeks back. It's at the point now where the cars are essentially identical and the only changes are the decals. And now the races look like parades ... gee, I wonder why ... yaaaawn ...

Posted by MarlinNut @ 09:54 AM PST [link]