Those of us who travel on business understand and appreciate what a difficult, frustrating prospect it can be when you have to fly from one city to another. The post-9/11 changes to travel regulations make it hard enough, and the miserly squeeze being placed on passengers by the airlines doesn’t help. Add to that mix a couple of rude passengers who think it’s all about them, and it’s a wonder you don’t see more people going nuts on airliners.

By all accounts, yesterday’s JetBlue Flight 1052 from Pittsburgh to New York’s JFK Airport was your typical commuter flight – lots of folks headed to the big city, each with their own agendas and plans, wanting nothing more than to get the flight behind them. Among those charged with the passengers’ safety and service was flight attendant Steven Slater, a 20-year veteran flight attendant who had recently rejoined JetBlue after five years away. Perhaps the time off wasn’t as rewarding as he’d hoped, or perhaps wiping up after a cabinful of rude, ungrateful passengers wasn’t as exciting as he remembered. All we really know is that after getting into a disagreement with an unruly passenger, he made his last flight an a JetBlue employee memorable for all onboard.

After he was bonked in the head by a bag, Steven Slater stunned passengers by spewing profanity and ranting about quitting as the flight from Pittsburgh pulled up to the gate about noon.

“To the f—–g a–hole who told me to f–k off, it’s been a good 20 years,” Slater, 38, purred, cops said. “I’ve had it. That’s it,” he added, a passenger said.

The mad-as-hell steward grabbed a couple of brewskis and popped one open before activating the emergency exit, witnesses told airport employees.

After tossing his two carry-on bags on the slide, he followed them to the tarmac.

Slater then walked to the AirTrain, stripped off his company tie and flung it off as bemused passengers watched.

“I wish we could all quit our jobs like that,” said passenger Phil Catelinet, 36, of Brooklyn, who was on the flight and the AirTrain.

“He seemed kind of happy about it. He was like, ‘I just quit my job.’ “

Slater calmly exited the airport and headed home, where he was taken into custody later in the day. In a court appearance this morning, he was charged with charged with criminal mischief, reckless endangerment and criminal trespass, and his bail set at $2500.

Interestingly, the majority of reaction towards Slater’s actions, while not necessarily endorsing his unorthodox exit, tends to be at least supportive of his frustration. As you might expect in this day and age, there are YouTube tributes and Facebook fan pages. There’s even talk of a reality show, presuming he ever gets another job.

Look, punching out of a plane isn’t a good idea, even on the tarmac. But after twenty years of dealing with self-centered jackholes day in and day out, it’s hard to blame the guy for finally snapping.

Got a hunch we haven’t heard the last on this one … stay tuned …

I was about to craft a witty, insightful post about the obvious impact the removal of steroids has had on baseball, as evidenced by the Tigers’ Armando Galarraga tossing the third perfect game in less than a month – a feat that had only happened 18 times in the history of baseball before those three. And then Jason Donald of the Indians walked up to the plate.

Donald represented Galarraga’s last obstacle – the 27th batter he had faced in the game without allowing a baserunner. He looked at a couple of outside pitches, then hit a sharp grounder in the hole between first and second bases. First baseman Miguel Cabrera moved to his right, scooped up the ball and – after waiting a beat for Galarraga to break towards first base – tossed the ball to the pitcher for the final out. The fans went wild – until they saw first base umpire Jim Joyce spread his arms wide, signaling Donald was safe. The perfect game – heck, even the no-hitter – were lost on that final play.

It would be hard enough to lose such a monumental achievement at the very last moment, but as the replay clearly showed, Joyce blew the call – Donald was out by half a step. Tigers manager Jim Leyland and several players ran up to complain, but the call stood. The next batter grounded weakly to shortstop, ending the game on the bitterest of notes.

As much talk as there would be had Galarraga achieved his perfect game, there will be a lot more after the bad call. The loudest voice will be that in favor of using instant replay for cases like this, an extension of the video review already in place for certain events such as determining fair or foul balls or whether a ball indeed cleared the fence for a home run. And while instant replay would certainly have overturned Joyce’s call and preserved perfection, I’m going to come out against it.

To me, one of the joys of baseball is its humanity. It’s not ruled by a clock but rather by the flow of the game – you have to get 27 outs, and you can do it as quickly or slowly as you like. The current usage of instant replay makes sense to me only because it reviews a portion of the game not immediately overseen by a human umpire – often, the closest ump can be over a hundred feet away. In those cases, instant replay is a tool, much like a pair of binoculars.

There are umpires stationed on every base, and when a play is made they are right on top of it. In the call tonight, Joyce was in the right place at the right time – he just blew the call. You expect them to get it right, just as you expect the shortstop to cleanly field a ground ball. But both men are human, and humans make mistakes, and sometimes that leads to unfortunate moments like tonight. But to subject their calls to review is to call their judgement into question. Most plays at a base are bang-bang – the umpire must be looking in one place and listening in another, and always to the right things. It takes years to develop the skill set required to perform at the big league level, and to me, that time earns you a certain respect. I know there are a lot of folks tonight in Detroit who passionately support instant replay, but I’d rather see the occasional blown call – even in such a crucial time – than to have every umpire question themselves on every play, knowing Big Brother is looking over their shoulder.

I love tabloid journalism. Unlike most people in the generations behind me, I recognize that it is entertainment and not fact, and don’t use it to make life-changing decisions … like, say, moving to the Jersey Shore. But as entertainment, it can’t be beat.

Since it’s effectively the modern day equivalent of the sideshow freak display, they depend on their headlines to suck people in the way a carney might back in the day. Take this one, which I saw a little bit ago:

“Ears save boy from death as crowds watch him dangle from window”

That one would suck me in even if I didn’t come from a long line of large-eared males. Apparently, little Ming Ming was wandering around on the balcony outside his parents’ apartment in Yinchang, China, when he slipped between the bars. I’ll let the tabloid pick it up from there …

Crowds gathered after hearing his screams and rescuers moved into save the child from an eight storey drop. An onlooker said: ‘The only thing stopping him from plunging to the ground below was the fact his head was trapped between two window bars.’ Once inside the flat firefighters quickly used a hydraulic pressure expander to force the bars apart and pulled Ming Ming back into the apartment.

Now to be fair, it looks to me like it’s actually his head that kept him from falling to his death, but who am I to stand between a headline and the truth. And, frankly, I’m happy he was saved, because there’s not nearly the same tabloid value in “Boy Plummets To Death” … :-O

For a long time, I’ve struggled with weight.  I was never an athlete, so while not fat, I was always soft.  I was blessed with a pretty high metabolism, not to mention borderline ADD, so I managed to burn off much of whatever I consumed. 

As I got older, though, and school transitioned to work and recess to cubicles, it was harder to avoid adding the pounds.  Never a lot, but I slowly gained weight over time.  By the time I reached thirty, I was learning the joy of diets, and went through a lot of them before finally realizing the key is simply to eat less and move more.

Imagine, then, my surprise to learn that it wasn’t my fault I kept piling on the pounds – I wasn’t an undisciplined eater, I was just addicted!

A new study in rats suggests that high-fat, high-calorie foods affect the brain in much the same way as cocaine and heroin. When rats consume these foods in great enough quantities, it leads to compulsive eating habits that resemble drug addiction, the study found.

“People know intuitively that there’s more to [overeating] than just willpower,” Paul J. Kenny, Ph.D says. “There’s a system in the brain that’s been turned on or over-activated, and that’s driving [overeating] at some subconscious level.”

In the study, rats were stuffed with bacon, frosting and other fatty people food. To no one’s surprise, they got fat, but their brains also changed chemically in a fashion very similar to drug addicts – even in the face of pain, the rats continued to gorge themselves.

What I really found interesting is the theory being floated on why the rats’ – and, presumably, our own – brains might be altered by fatty foods in a way similar to cocaine. According to Dr.Gene-Jack Wang, it’s because the development of drug processing and food processing have mirrored each other over time.

Coca leaves have been used since ancient times, he points out, but people learned to purify or alter cocaine to deliver it more efficiently to their brains (by injecting or smoking it, for instance). This made the drug more addictive.

According to Wang, food has evolved in a similar way. “We purify our food,” he says. “Our ancestors ate whole grains, but we’re eating white bread. American Indians ate corn; we eat corn syrup.”

The ingredients in purified modern food cause people to “eat unconsciously and unnecessarily,” and will also prompt an animal to “eat like a drug abuser [uses drugs],” says Wang.

Interesting theory, doctor. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to find my mirror so I can draw out a line of frosting …

With all due apologies to my friends in the Pacific Northwest and on the East Coast, who will no doubt laugh at my whining … I’m getting pretty tired of rain. This is the Sunshine State, but we’re not used to liquid sunshine.  Just yesterday, it was somewhere in the mid-80′s and summertime was taking hold.  Now, look – it’s another storm rolling in tonight! Someone go fire up StormWatch …

Now, for most of us the rain is little more than a nuisance. It interferes with my riding schedule and makes my backyard look more like a mudbog than turf, but it’s pretty hard to really complain. The folks with the biggest issues – and, apparently, the loudest voices – are the people living in the canyon areas that burned last summer.

The amazing thing is that we haven’t even reached what would normally be considered the “rainy” season here in SoCal, and we’ve already gotten 11 inches of rain. Compare that to the normal yearly average of 14, and perhaps you can understand everyone’s consternation – and the concern of the folks in the hills.

Normally, I’d make some pithy comments about how those folks should have known what they were getting into living up in the canyons, and how tiring it is to hear them complain about the authorities forcing them to evacuate for their own safety – and then complaining even more if they don’t – but I think I’ll let them slide for now …

Looking for a little oneupsmanship with the boys in the golf foursome? Ever thought about owning your own private plane? Well, have I got a deal for you – a low hours Airbus A320 that can be yours for little more than salvage costs! Of course, you’ll have to clean the mud and goose guts out of it, and assembly is definitely required …

As you may have guessed, the plane in question is N106US, the Airbus A320-214 airliner skillfully landed in the Hudson River last year by Chesley Sullenberger.  When last we saw it, it was on a barge headed down to river to parts unknown.  Now we know that unknown destination is a salvage yard and a sale being managed by Chartis Insurance.  But before you whip out your checkbook, you may want to read the terms and conditions …

Sale of the listed aircraft is “AS IS/WHERE IS.” We make no expressed nor implied warranties for the condition, fitness for purpose, value, airworthiness or operation of performance of any kind whatsoever, whether in contract or tort in respect to the sale of any aircraft salvage. The buyer acknowledges that they have had the opportunity to inspect and evaluate the aircraft before submitting their bid.

OK, so maybe it’ll cost a little to haul it back to the mansion, but what a conversation piece! Imagine a desk chair made from Sully’s captains seat, or a multimedia room made from the fuselage … why the possibilities are endless!

Don’t wait … operators are standing by …

Chances are, you don’t know who Steve Phillips is. If you a baseball fan you might recognize him as an analyst for ESPN, and if your favorite team is the Mets you may remember his as your former general manager. But the average person likely had no clue who Phillips is – until the New York Post splashed the details of his infidelity across their front page today.

Phillips, it seems, had an affair this summer with a 22-yr-old intern with whom he worked at ESPN. Those sort of things have a way of getting found out, and his bosses at the network disciplined him and he ended the relationship. I’m sure Phillips thought that was going to be the end of things, but he found out this week it’s not gonna be that easy. Stealing a page from the “Fatal Attraction” playbook, Brooke Hundley decided that she would not be ignored, making bizarre phone calls, leaving a letter at Phillips’ house and reportedly contacting one of his children on Facebook.

In retaliation, the jilted young woman repeatedly phoned Phillips’ wife, Marni, saying, “We both can’t have him!” an explosive police report claims.

Hundley’s desperate actions — including accidentally smashing her car into a stone column while speeding away from the Phillips’ home after leaving the letter — terrified the family, according to the Wilton, Conn., police report.

“I have extreme concerns about the health and safety of my kids and myself,” Steve Phillips said in a police statement, adding that the woman became “obsessive and delusional” after he dumped her.

As a single guy, there are certain things in this world with which I have no experience – like being a married guy in an affair. But I’d like to think I’d do a better job of vetting my partner than Phillips did. This one’s clearly a few bricks short of a load, which isn’t entirely surprising for someone that age. But beyond that, if you’re going to put your personal and professional lives on the line, why would you do it with a girl who – how can I put this delicately – reminds me of the players on the college women’s softball team who always wanted to arm-wrestle the men. Erin Andrews this girl is not. Somewhere, Bill Clinton is letting out a sigh of relief because Phillips just took his title of “Worst Pick of Intern to Nail”. I just don’t get it. I understand loveless marriages and desperation, but this one escapes even me.

Phillips took a leave of absense from ESPN to deal with the problem. I would assume that Hundley – whose antics outside Phillips’ house led to the police call that ultimately blew the whistle on the whole deal – has some legal issues of her own. Here’s hoping the collateral damage avoids the innocent parties and the whole thing can be resolved in private – and out of the media.

It’s been a while since we heard from Nadya Suleman, the famewhore with 14 kids and a tummy stretched to next Tuesday. This might be just the thing to get you back into the news, babe …

Umm ... ewwww!

An outfit called [re]design, whose motto is “for designers who don’t want to make landfill,” has an exhibition touring England called “Doing It For The Kids“. The goal of the show is to highlight various examples of sustainable play design, but I’m pretty sure that one example is going to garner the lion’s share of the media attention. I refer to, of course, the … wait for it … placenta teddy bear! That’s right – now, thanks to designer Alex Green and his “Teddy Twin Kit,” you can take what would otherwise be deemed biowaste and turn it into a unique if less than cuddly buddy for your baby – and a perfect genetic match, too!

Green’s ‘Twin Teddy Kit’ ‘celebrates the unity of the infant, the mother and the placenta,’ and enables preparation of the placenta so it may be transformed into a teddy bear. The placenta must be cut in half and rubbed with sea salt to cure it. After it is dried out, it is treated with an emulsifying mixture of tannin and egg yolk to make it soft and pliable. Then, you craft it into a teddy bear.

Yeah … and not want to eat for a week. This one might be a little much for your average seamstress.  Judging from the pictures, our little friend is only a couple of inches high, but hey – there’s a rather limited supply of raw materials.  Of course, Octomom and her nemesis Kate Gosselin could probably sew a full-sized teddy from their leftovers … and Michelle Duggar could probably stitch up a life-sized bear – one that’s still growing as we speak … :-0

Ready to take the plunge, Mr. Prime Minister?

Once in a while, I’ll catch some heat over the age of some of the Eye Candy selections we post here at the MB.  I mean, it’s not like I’m posting pictures of Miley Cyrus or something, but unless I’m in a particularly milfy mood there’s a decade – or generation – in age between myself and most of the models.  But I’ve got nothing on Silvio Berlusconi.

Berlusconi, the 72-yr-old Prime Minister of Italy, is a rich and powerful man.  Beyond the political clout afforded the senior leader of the G8 nations, Berlusconi owns several media outlets as well as the AC Milan football club.  This is a guy who knows what he wants, and has the power to get it.

Right now, what he apparently wants is shown at right jumping off a boat in Sardinia.  Noemi Letizia is an 18-yr old aspiring model in whom Berlusconi has taken an unnaturally active interest.  All parties – the PM, the model and the model’s family – claim everything is innocent, but Berlusconi’s wife recently filed for divorce, making the statement at the time: “I cannot be with a man who spends time with under-age women.” Around the same time, Berlusconi attended Noemi’s 18th birthday party, presenting her with a gold and diamond necklace and a book inscribed:

“To my little Noemi, my little graphic artist, your little daddy teacher.”

Even taking into consideration the roughness of the translation, it’s not exactly “Happy Birthday, Princess”. Italians are a tolerant lot, but I’m not sure they’re this tolerant.

Personally, I blame French President Nicolas Sarkozy. Ever since he bagged model Carla Bruni, the bar’s been set pretty high for European Leaders. It certainly gives the term “keeping up with the Joneses” a whole new meaning.

And I even managed to work water in one more time …

They’re at it again.

Our Lady of Perpetual Pregnancy, Michelle Duggar, is once again with child.  For those of you keeping count, this’ll be spawn #19 – conceived a scant 5 months after the birth of the last one.  You’d think that’s barely enough time to let the system reset, but I guess she’s had a lot of practice.

The Duggars – husband Jim-Bob and wife Michelle – have become famous through their cable reality show, “18 Kids & Counting.”  As you might guess from the title, what makes them famous is the size of their brood – you know how America loves their reality freak shows.  Much like John and Kate Gosselin and Nadia Suleman, people love to peek at the perceived chaos of trying to raise a whole flock of children.

The Duggars story goes something like this:  Michelle moved from Ohio to Arkansas where she had a religious conversion, and Jim-Bob was one of the churchmembers sent to “counsel” her.  Soon, counseling had turned to courting, and in 1984 the pair married.  After the birth of their first child, Michelle suffered a miscarriage that the couple attributed to a temporary use of birth control pills; after that, they decided against further birth control efforts and would “allow God to determine the number of children they would have.”  Apparently, God has been busy elsewhere and forgot to send the “whoa” signal to Jim-Bob and Michelle.

Michelle Duggar is 42, and will have spent nearly 14 years pregnant by the time this round is done.  After two Caesarians, you’d think her uterus couldn’t take the strain, but apparently they were able to patch her up like a steel-belted radial and send her out for another lap.  But I guess that’s to be expected – baby-making is the Duggar family business.  Oldest son Josh is about to bring the first second-generation Duggar into the world, and Jim-Bob and Michelle went on the Today show to announce her pregnancy.  Think they’d care what the Duggars were up to – or sponsors would roll up to the house with truckloads of product – if Michelle weren’t with child?  I doubt it …

The Duggars like to point out that, in spite of raising 18 kids in a 7,000-sq-ft home, they live “debt-free.”  Jim-Bob attributes this to a frugal lifestyle and wise financial planning, but I’m sure those checks from the network don’t hurt much either, eh J-B?  They’ve made the decision to subject their lives – and those of their children – to the scrutiny and judgement of the public, all in the name of money.  Maybe that’ll work and maybe it won’t – perhaps they might want to check with the folks at “Jon & Kate Plus Eight” to see how that can turn out.

I’m a Christian, and I respect the Duggars’ right to their beliefs.  I also believe in the right of an individual to do what they want in the world.  But, as the old saying goes, your personal rights end where mine begin.  Sure, they might not be sponging off the government for subsistence, but how about the impact of bringing so many new bodies into the world?  Maybe they haven’t gotten the word yet in Arkansas, but there’s a population crisis in the world, and this doesn’t help.  The world needs responsible decisions, not blind obedience, and it sure doesn’t need another Duggar kid.

Here’s a thought, Jim-Bob – next time you get the urge, try hand-firing one …